Let Freedom Ring
Fifty years after Jackie Robinson broke baseball’s color barrier, another color barrier has finally fallen.
Yes, it’s true! For the first time ever, a sausage of color will race in the sausage race at Miller Park on Saturday, when Mexican Chorizo takes his place alongside veterans American hotdog, Italian sausage, Polish sausage, and German bratwurst.
Nicknamed “El Picante” and wearing number 5, Chorizo proudly shows his pride in his ethnic heritage by refusing to wear an ordinary baseball cap in favor of an oversized Mexican sombrero.
But a good question is, why did it take so long? Latino sausages have long since proven that they compete on the highest levels of flavor and between-inning sprinting, and yet they did not make the major leagues until 2006?
An even better question is, why is Chorizo only being called up for one game, only to be “sent back to the minors for more seasoning” in the words of Brewers GM Doug Melvin, and not making another appearance until 2007?
Clearly the evil forces of entrenched racism yet endure.
July 28th, 2006 at 1:28 pm
I think diversity in the sausage race is a great thing. They should bring in some flavor into it. How bout a soysage for the vegetarians out there? I’ll bet that low-cholesterol conglomerate of spices, soy, wheat, and yeast would have a lot more stamina than the pork products. It could wear a tie-dye shirt and instead of having a number just wear a ying-yang symbol. Destined to be a huge hit in Milwaukee.
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July 28th, 2006 at 2:27 pm
In the name of my Scottish forebears, I demand a Racing Haggis. He (or, for that matter, “she”—I see no reason why an anthropomorphized stomach stuffed with animal by-products cannot be female) can wear a kilt!
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July 28th, 2006 at 4:32 pm
Forgot to mention:
Randall Simon struck a blow to efforts to ever get any bitterbal into the race. It’s a fried ball of sausage, popular in Curacao. Hopefully the bitterbal crowd will henceforth adopt the nonviolent approach to social change that worked for Ghandi and Dr. King.
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August 1st, 2006 at 9:49 am
I’d have to disagree about the Dodgers, Nick. I see them as clear 7/31 winners.
Lugo won’t lose his job when Kent comes back. Kent has played 1st before, and he’ll play it now. He’s a terrible 2nd baseman who still has a special bat. This trade is an obvious sign that Nomar isn’t coming back anytime soon. Lugo is one of the more underrated explosive offensive talents in the game, and I think they paid less than they should have, considering their stockpile of young OFs.
Weaker teams would have packed it in with such a loss. (Especially considering that they are in the NL west cellar.) They easily could have started retooling for the next 3 years, but the addition of Maddux, Lugo and Betimit give thiem a legit change to take this horrendous division. (only 5 games back I believe.)
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July 31st, 2008 at 3:32 pm
[...] up to be one of the quieter trade deadlines in recent memory. Nevertheless, as I have done every year on this blog, I’ll be here all afternoon to give you hasty reactions to each trade as [...]
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