So it’s all said and done in the American League. The Detroit Tigers keep on winning and nothing seems to contain their momentum. So much for my predix; I had the A’s in the Fall Classic; I had them going down to the Mets, but as far as I was concerned, they were playing in the World Series.

To be honest, I had more of a spiteful analysis of this year’s playoff picture simply because I felt frustrated that the White Sox hadn’t made it. And on top of that, two former South Siders, who were huge for the Pale Hose while in Chicago, were heading into the ALCS in opposite sides of the diamond.

Frank and MaggsBoth Frank Thomas and Magglio Ordoñez left Chicago in bad terms and both were looking to earn some respect outside the Windy City. Maggs most definitely got his; big Frank? He’s wearing a big fat skirt.

Ordoñez deserves to go to the World Series. He was my favorite White Sox for a while (I still have his #30 stitched to the back of my authentic home J) and I remember reading he was sad to watch his former teammates win it all last year one season after he had left.

The Sox let Maggs walk after the ’04 season not without exchanging words in the media over the nature of the contract negotiations. In typical White Sox fashion, they offered an undervalued contract, which he promptly turned down. There was also some animosity between him and Ozzie Guillen.

The injury he suffered during that year didn’t help the situation. Maggs later revealed he felt Kenny Williams had hurt his Free Agent value by talking up the injury to his knee and the subsequent treatment he sought in Austria (a procedure not allowed in the U.S.)

In other words, the Sox and Maggs were not best friends. Oh yea, and then there was that profanity-laced tirade between him and Ozzie.

It’s not uncommon for the Sox to alienate their former stars; they did it to Robin Ventura, they even did it to Ozzie himself. And of course, they did it to Big Frank.

Now, don’t think for a minute that I don’t/didn’t appreciate Frank. He was the first Sox I recognized (other than Michael Jordan); my first White Sox collectibles were a Frank Thomas poster, his posing action figure, a “Back-to-back MVP” banner from his two awards in 93 and 94 and of course, Reebok’s original Big Hurt shoes. Gotta have the shoes.the original Big Hurts (yes that's me wearing them)

But after hearing Colin Cowherd whine about how Frank was now making it big in the Bay because he was free from all the Media Scrutiny in Chicago; I remembered all the disputes he had with former managers (specially Jerry Manuel) because he wouldn’t be treated as King Frank. He would continuously go on a media boycott, refraining from talking on-the-record with reporters because his tantrums were, according to him, portrayed as, well, tantrums.

But wait, Colin, last time I checked, Big Frank accumulated all his power numbers while wearing a giant S-O-X on his chest; he won two MVP awards and could’ve easily won a third in 2003 if it wasn’t for our favorite Benign Tumor, Jason Giambi.

He merely was eligible for come-back player this year; sure he got his swing back but he had been badly injured last year. And even though he was good ol’ Frank of old in the ALDS, he pulled another Big Skirt, going O-Fer in the ALCS. Oh Why Does That Sound Familiar?

The Big Skirt

And now, after hitting the ALCS-clinching home run, Maggs is going to the World Series in true superstar status.

But dude, what’s up with the hair?

Would this be UFH?

No Responses to “What’s up with the skirt, Frank?”

  1. Coley,
    I think I agree that Bochy was a valuable part of the Padres this season. Although I have long thought that Bochy was overrated, it astounds me that he was able to turn that bunch of scrap out in San Diego into a playoff team. I don’t really like him, but you can’t let the guy go – can you?

  2. Coley Ward says:

    This seems to be the offseason of underappreciated managers. I think there’s a real possibility that Joe Girardi, the guy who will almost certainly win manager of the year, is going to be without a job come spring. How is that possible?

  3. i love the hair too

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