Everybody not on board with the solidarity-hawk.
On Saturday, Bugs and Cranks brought us the news that Shane “The Flying Hawaiin” Victorino had adopted a mohawk.
Today, the Phillies’ website says that not everyone on the team is anxious to adopt the same look:
An informal survey of players most proud of their hair — Kyle Kendrick, Kyle Lohse, J.D. Durbin and J.C. Romero — revealed that none support the shaved Mohawk look of Shane Victorino.
Durbin offered to sport the look for “a few thousand dollars,” while Lohse gave an unenthusiastic “maybe” when asked if he could get behind a team-wide movement.
“I’m being neutral, and obviously, I’d lean toward ‘No,’” Lohse said. “In high school, the basketball team all shaved their heads and I looked like I got dropped on my head. It was just bad.”
You’ve got to love Lohse’s honesty. Some guys just have weirdly shaped heads. And those guys shouldn’t sport a mohawk. It takes a truly self-aware person to realize that he’s not mohawk material. If only Britney could have come to a similar realization before jumping into her MTV VMA outfit.
Lumpy heads aside, the best “no mohawk for me” answer undoubtedly came from Durbin, who sounds like a guy who fully appreciates that his mlb career is hanging by a thread. Durbin, who has a 6.46 ERA, will shave his head — but only if you pay him. He’ll take cash, credit, food stamps…whatever you’ve got. J.D. Durbin is not proud. He’s just trying to support his family.
September 5th, 2007 at 2:32 pm
…tell me you meant Justin, not Jason.
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September 5th, 2007 at 2:50 pm
How ironic is it that under the title “Yahoo Sports: Edited by Yahoos?” you go on abut how the poor younger brother is living under his big brother’s shadow, and you actually get the guy’s name wrong? Classic! Who’s your editor?
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September 5th, 2007 at 3:00 pm
Ah, fuck. Oh well. I’ve fixed it now.
Just the perfect end to the perfect day.
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September 5th, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Green, this new job you’ve got sounds awesome. Your day ends at 3 P.M.? I want a job like that. Hook a brother up!
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September 5th, 2007 at 3:52 pm
Goddammit! Another “mental typo.” Did I say end? I meant “unending middle.” Crap crap crap!
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September 6th, 2007 at 3:45 am
We totally had the same day honey.
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December 28th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
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