From left, outfielders Choo Freeman and Matt Holliday and infielders Jamey Carroll and Todd Helton are among the Rockies who hold prayer meetings.Divine intervention. What else could possibly explain how the Colorado Rockies have steamrolled through the National League competition in the 2007 postseason? Three game sweep of the Philadelphia Phillies. Four game sweep of the Arizona Diamondbacks. Seven wins in seven games. And this phenomenon can only be explained by the act of a higher power.

It is abundantly clear. God wanted to spare us all from any more damage inflicted by TBS’ coverage of the 2007 playoffs.

So thank you god, for not making us sit through any more than the minimum seven games. And thank you, Colorado Rockies, for being the instruments of god. Even though I suspect that at least half of you keep a little sumthin’-sumthin’ in your crucifixes around your neck*. Yeah, that’s right. That’s called the “Sarah Michelle Gellar“.

*Please, please don’t sue me. Ever since 2005, my investments (consisting mainly of Mark McGwire rookie cards) have just tanked. Damn the Mitchell investigation.

13 Responses to “They Really Were On A Mission From God (or g-d if the “O” offends you)”

  1. Nick Kapur says:

    This is a great point about the stolen bases. It really surprises me that the Halos’ SB percentage is so low (well into the hurting-rather-than-helping zone).

    I do think some other things that might be worth looking at when evaluating the contribution each team’s speed to their offense would be how often they go from first to third on singles, how often they hit and run, and how successfully they hit and run.

    One thing that you are always hearing about the Angles is that they go from first to third on singles more often than any other team, by a large margin. I’m not sure if that is really the case, but if it’s true, that would provide a huge jump in the chance of scoring runs, and would represent a significant speed-based advantage that can not be found just by looking at SB% alone.

    If, as you suggest in your column, the Angels trail the Sox in almost every offensive category, yet are about even in runs, thats kind of a mystery, but maybe one that something like a preternatural ability to go from first to third might be able to explain. I haven’t done any research on this obviously, but it would be interesting to do some and see…

  2. Nick Kapur says:

    Okay, after a little bit of research, sure enough the Angels went from first to third on singles a ridiculous 120 times this past season, and were only thrown out a mere 7 times. By comparison, no other team in baseball even did it 100 times.

    For some historical perspective, the Angels have successfully gone from first to third on singles a ridiculous 531 times since 2003, 48 times more than the next best team in all of baseball (the St. Louis Cardinals), and 63 times more than the best AL team (which is, surprisingly enough, the New York Yankees).

    There’s your one edge you were looking for to concede to the Angles.

  3. Sarah Green says:

    Damn you, Nick. Where are you when I’m on deadline?? Oh, that’s right. Japan.

    As an update to this post, I found this ridiculous article in USA Today. It actually came out yesterday, but I only got around to reading it this morning.

    In it, Paul White, like me, concedes just about every advantage to the Red Sox. Lackey has been good, he writes, but “the entire Angels pitching staff was worked over by the Red Sox this season, a 6.04 team ERA in their 10 games.” The Angels don’t have a lot of power, especially with the injuries in their lineup.

    Meanwhile, as he notes, the Red Sox do have power. The one issue that Boston has been struggling with, according to him, is a few late-season injuries. (Though it should be noted that I think Francona was being intentionally over-cautious with Youkilis and Ramirez, to rest them for the postseason.)Plus, he writes, Crisp was down with a virus during the last week of the season.

    And yet….his prediction? “Angels in 5.” Because the CF had a sore throat? I don’t get it.

  4. Alejandro says:

    Man, I should’ve live-blogged this one….

  5. So you are GODS team………well it looks like the romans have thrown the christians to lions!! The GODLESS Red Sox have taken you to task and will continue to do so. I have but one question when you lose the World Series does that finally proof once and for all that there is no GOD!!

  6. Paul Moro says:

    Dk, did you even read this post? Or are you just commenting on it?

    Is the “you” in this comment me? Because I can’t lose the World Series. My team didn’t even make the playoffs.

    And I’m pretty sure that Red Sox Nation is a religion. So in your world, god is Jason Varitek. So god does exist.

  7. Yes I read the post it is just that I find it hard to believe that your god has nothing better to do than to help your team win baseball games. Please get your head out of your a$$.

  8. Paul Moro says:

    Dude, the whole post is a joke. So my head is currently nowhere near an “a” and two dollar signs.

  9. Paul Moro says:

    And I’m not sure where you’re getting the idea that I’m a Rockies fan. They’re not “my team”.

  10. Paul, you gotta shield yourself from that brain-dead Deadspin traffic.

  11. Sarah Green says:

    No joke, Blastings. Yikes. I think I’ve met this guy at Fenway. I think he spilled his $7 beer on me and then shouted unfunny, profanity-laced comments for several innings.

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