This is one of a series of posts in which we grade each team’s wily hot stove maneuvers and tragic offseason blunders.

“It all began when we traded Aaron Rowand,” says my colleague, and fellow ChiSox fan, Joeff Davis, “Who’d we get in that deal? We shouldn’t have made that deal.”

On the surface, I would typically agree with Joeff. Shipping a fan favorite in a blockbuster deal is always a gamble, but at the time, it was a risk the GM felt he needed to make. And it made sense. Acquire a future hall-of-famer in Jim Thome, who can produce from the DH slot, a spot vacated with the then departure of a diminished Frank Thomas.

But if at any point are we to measure the intangibles in baseball, it’s with trades like this. Aaron Rowand earned the nickname “the legend” because of is all-out style of play and demeanor in the clubhouse, according to his teammates off course. Moving a player like that can only break the chemistry, the balance, that reigned in the dugout. Ask any White Sox fan, “what’s one of the more memorable moments of the 2005 world series?” Some will say Scott Podsednik’s walk-off homer in game two, but the true fan will say, Rowand’s reaction to said home run, captured and broadcast all over the world.

Ever since that trade, the Sox have hit a funk; sure they won 90 games in 2006, but that wasn’t even good enough for second place. Sure, Kenny Williams solidified the bullpen, and assembled what seemed to be a strong rotation; plus, the addition of Thome to its already home-run-hitting lineup couldn’t hurt. But of course, the runs never came; and thus, the 90-win team that barely missed the playoffs in ‘06, became the 72-win team on the brink of rebuilding in ‘07.

It’s the center fielder, stupid

Funny how one move can hurt a team in so many ways. After Rowand was traded, Williams knew one of his glaring priorities was to find a suitable replacement to patrol center field. Seemingly, the team was loaded with promising prospects: Jerry Owens, Brian Anderson, Ryan Sweeny, so naturally, the team that produced Carlos Lee, Magglio Ordoñez and Aaron Rowand would no doubt call up the next star-in-the-making. Well, I have two words for all of you: Joe Borchard. The single, most expensive longest home-run ever hit at U.S. Cellular field.

Though Anderson was an apt defensive replacement in 2006, his offensive numbers were abominable: 135 games, .225 .290 .359. There was no way he’d make the team in 2007 with those numbers. Both Owens and Sweeny had their fair share of AB’s last year, with Owens coming off as the potential candidate for center field. Sweeny was traded to the A’s in the Swisher deal. So what did Williams do last year? He signed Darin Erstad. He just couldn’t stay off the vets.

Get to the HOA already!

So rolling into 2008, the message was loud and clear: Kenny, get a center fielder. That’s it. Well, turns out Williams was set on getting said center fielder; he tried. He honestly tried. And when he failed, he splurged all his CF cash on relievers. And he made some trades.

Well, what about Carlos Quentin, he’s an outfielder.

Yes, Williams traded a young first baseman to the D’backs for Quentin, but let’s keep things in context. The Sox needed a center fielder that could produce out of the 6th or 7th spot on the line-up, Quentin was out most of last year, and coming off an injury can be a tough time adjustments-wise to any major leaguer. No matter what his upside is.

Fine, then what about Nick Swisher? He can play the outfield too.

Yes, Swisher can play the outfield, but he’s been a natural right fielder a spot that Jermaine Dye will not give up, nor should he. In 2007 Swisher logged 59 games at center, 57 at right, 44 at first and 5 as a DH. Though he only committed three errors in center, that’s one more than what Anderson made while playing 134 games at center in 2006. So he’s definitely not a defensive upgrade.

In all honesty, the center field issue is becoming moot. Williams got someone to patrol center, and that should be enough for now, but then he made some other puzzling moves. Why sign Uribe if you were actively looking to upgrade at short, trading one of your more consistent starters for a veteran like Orlando Cabrera? (Don’t say you weren’t looking to upgrade - you were and that’s a good thing). Why resign Joe Crede if Josh Fields is ripe for a full major league season? Who’ll play left?

Yes, the bullpen needed some work, but why in the blazes would you sign Octavio Dotel for $11 million dollars? Why give Scott Linebrink, a reliever with a respectable, yet not outstanding, 3.71 era, and a 2:1 K/BB ratio, $19 million over 4 years?

I don’t know. It seems to me that after 2007, the ChiSox panicked into thinking they had too many holes, when in reality, an upgrade at center, left, and perhaps short would’ve sufficed. Well, actually, the bullpen could’ve used some work too, I guess. So in retrospect, Williams addressed most of these needs with players he probably didn’t envision. But all in all, I still have this foreboding sense of pessimism. Let’s hope it’s only remnants of 2007’s nightmare.

Notable Additions: Orlando Cabrera, Carlos Quentin, Nick Swisher, Scott Linebrink, Octavio Dotel

Notable departures: Jon Garland, Ryan Sweeney, Gio Gonzalez, Faustino De Los Santos (both in the Swisher trade), David Aardsma

Lineup

C - A.J. Pierzynksi
1B - Paul Konerko
2B - Danny Richard
SS - Orlando Cabrera
3B - Joe Crede/Josh Fields
LF - Josh Fields/Jerry Owens
CF - Nick Swisher/Jerry Owens
RF - Jermaine Dye
DH - Jim Thome

Rotation

LH - Mark Buehrle
RH - Javier Vazquez
RH - Jose Contreras
RH - Gavin Floyd
LH - John Danks

Setup: Octavio Dotel, 4.11 ERA, 11 saves
Closer: Bobby Jenks, 2.77 ERA, 40 saves

Grade: B -

I have to give Williams some credit for pulling off some bold trades when the free agent market snubbed him, even if those trades moved the team on a horizontal plane, talent-wise, instead of drastically improving it. And if we’re to take the recently held SoxFest as any indication, fans overall are cautiously optimistic:

CHICAGO — Ken Williams was so excited to take questions from the White Sox faithful during Sunday’s final SoxFest event that he began the last of three weekend Town Hall Meetings some 30 minutes before its scheduled start.

Williams had the idea for the early opening when he was signing autographs and a handful of fans started throwing him questions about the White Sox. So, Williams sat on the dais by himself, as participants lined up behind a crowd microphone to continue heaping praise upon his offseason work.

[…]

“One thing I couldn’t figure out was, to me, we made some obvious improvements,” Williams said. “I couldn’t figure out why this team wasn’t being viewed the way we all internally were feeling.

“Despite what fans read or hear on the radio, our fans will make up their own minds and draw their own conclusions. I realize it’s a small sample size-wise, but they have a chance to voice their pleasure or displeasure and it’s appreciated.”

Will the fans respond the same way at the ticket booth?

- Hot Offseason Action Index -

Topps has presidential election fever.

Along with stars like Alex Rodriguez and Ryan Howard, the new Topps set includes a dozen cards featuring presidential candidates (six Democrats and six Republicans). Sadly, fans of Chris Dodd, Duncan Hunter, Mike Gravel, and Tom Tancredo will not find their candidate among the set. On average, one candidate card will be found in every ninth pack, which each cost about $3 and contain a dozen baseball cards.

The presidential cards won’t be sold seperately, so you’ll have to spend hundreds of dollars before you put together a complete candidate set. But, dude, it will be so worth it!

New York Times sportswriter, George Vecsey, penned a wonderfully ridiculous article in today’s edition, essentially playing the role of party pooper in the Johan Santana celebration. Why? Quite frankly, I’m not sure. And I’m not convinced that George knows either. He writes:

Omar Minaya may ice the deal for Johan Santana any hour now but, until further notice, the Mets are still the team that fell apart last September, disastrously.

The Mets still have to report to their legion of self-appointed probation officers, that is to say, Mets fans, on a regular basis from now until October to prove they are not recidivists in the worrisome habit of folding.

Actually, George, in case you didn’t notice, the majority of us Mets fans (rightly or wrongly), are quite happy at the moment. If we really are the “probation officers”, then the ex-con just dropped off James “Whitey” Bulger on our front doorstep.

I would strongly advise giddy Mets fans to envision the Marlins and the Nationals whacking them around in the final two weeks of last season. That should neutralize the euphoria, assuming Minaya and the family Wilpon sign the Twins’ star lefty to a six-year contract.

Why would we want to do that? That sounds about as much fun as punching yourself in the groin repeatedly just to prevent yourself from making a move on that incredibly cute girl standing across the room and giving you that ‘come hither’ stare. It’s completely irrational.

Essentially, the Mets are front-ending their pitching staff — Santana for the departed Tom Glavine. That upgrade does not necessarily make them a better…

And this is where Vecsey’s logic supernovas into a blackhole. Is he really arguing that keeping Tom Glavine may actually have been preferable to adding Johan Santana? Do I even need to post comparative statistics to prove how inane that suggestion is?

Even if Santana stays healthy, he is 28, and pitchers can fall apart in a heartbeat. For that matter, he did not have such a wonderful September himself.

See, George, you were so freaking close to making a coherent statement with that first sentence. Yes, pitchers (moreso than hitters) are a fragile bunch. But “he is 28″ is your argument? 28 is too old for you? I’m 27 and am still waiting to hit puberty for god’s sakes (any day now…). And picking one freaking month - 5 games - out of a pitcher’s 251-game career (that’s less than 2% of games he’s appeared for those who care) simply doesn’t make sense.

Besides, he can start only once every five games, or somewhat more than 30 starts a season.

Do I need to continue? Fine. I’ll keep going. By this logic, no starting pitcher in MLB is worth much of anything since they “can only start once every five games”. But Jon Rauch is more valuable because he pitched decently in 88 games.

Let’s say (Santana) wins 20 games. He is still taking up a certain number of starts that would have been made, and perhaps even won, by another regular.

I’m not even going to talk about VORP to get my point across. But this is like trying to minimize the impact of Alex Rodriguez by making a case for Wilson Betemit. Had the Mets not landed Santana, they would have trotted Mike Pelfrey - or even worse, signed Livan Hernandez - instead.

Little has changed since last September. Paul Lo Duca is being replaced by Brian Schneider at catcher, maybe an upgrade in defense and comportment but a downgrade in hitting, and they now have Ryan Church in right field, not necessarily a big deal.

Um, have you forgotten what you were writing about in the first place? Isn’t the whole point of this article to talk about the Mets trading for Johan Santana? That’s a “little change”?

The core of the team remains the same. Moises Alou was a rock last September, but he turns 42 this summer. David Wright is terrific, but not yet the assertive leader he may be someday. Carlos Beltrán has his moments.

You know something’s wrong when Moises Alou is described as “a rock” but Carlos Beltran - arguably the best all round centerfielder in baseball - is diminished to a “has his moments”.

On a team constructed with veteran players, many of them Latino, no critical mass of leadership emerged to shake Reyes out of his walkabout… It appears that nobody took Reyes into the back room and said, “¿Qué tal?”— what’s up?

See, now you’re just guessing to make a point. And not only that, what does being Latino have anything to do with anything?

Ultimately, you can make the case that the Mets shouldn’t have traded away their future. I disagree given the supposed talent levels of the prospects headed to Minnesota, but at least it’s a plausible argument. You can make the case that no pitcher deserves such a lengthy guaranteed deal and logistically speaking, you’d be right. But for a big-market team like the Mets - with their own cable network and a new stadium opening in 2009, the financial damage isn’t completely crippling.

But what doesn’t make sense is trying to argue that the 2008 Mets are not a better team now than they were last week. It doesn’t make sense to insinuate that keeping Tom Glavine instead of acquiring the best pitcher in baseball may have been the right move. And even Vecsey himself can’t believe that Carlos Beltran is simply a player who “has his moments”.

AAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

See what you did, George? You reduced me to doing a terrible Lewis Black impersonation. I hope you’re happy, sir.

This is one of a series of posts in which we grade each team’s wily hot stove maneuvers and tragic offseason blunders.

This should be the first year the Rays officially become a “trendy pick” to reach the playoffs. Of course, they won’t make the playoffs. But it will be trendy to pick them, nonetheless.

Moreover, the Rays are a feel good pick. They’re so…unthreatening. They’re all young, and they like to run and some of them have fun names like Rocco, and they leave cute voice mail messages, like “you dead, dawg.”

So I think we’re all pulling for the Rays this year, even if they still have a ways to go before they can seriously challenge the Sox and the Yankees.

The Rays entered the offseason with one glaring need: pitching. And they addressed it. Tampa’s team ERA last season was 5.53, so GM Andrew Friedman traded last year’s Rookie of the Year runner-up Delmon Young to the Twins for SP Matt Garza, who should serve as an able number three starter, behind ace Scott Kazmir and up-and-comer James Shields, who the Rays just signed to a four year extension. Everyone knows Kazmir is a strikeout machine, but Shields is the real deal, too, posting a sub-4 ERA and 1.11 WHIP in 2007. The remaining two SP spots will be filled out by two from the group of Andy Sonnanstine, Edwin Jackson, Jeff Niemann, Jason Hammel or J.P. Howell.

The Rays also addressed their bullpen, signing Troy Percival to a two year deal. He’ll be the team’s closer, while Al Reyes, who came out of nowhere last year to post solid numbers, will be the set-up man. Dan Wheeler will also provide a proven bullpen arm.

On the offensive side, the Rays added Cliff Floyd, who will play a little right field, and a little DH, and generally mentor the kidos. By trading Delmon Young, the Rays lost a promising young player. But they also lost a guy who’s rock-bottom OBP was a drain on the team last season. He’ll be replaced by a rotation of Cliff Floyd/Rocco Baldelli/Jonny Gomes. If Baldelli is healthy, he’s going to emerge as the permanent RF. But as we’ve learned over the years, a healthy Rocco is not a given.

Jason Bartlett will man short this season, but probably not next season. He’s just a place-holder until Reid Brignac is ready, probably in 2009. Here’s what ESPN’s Sean McAdam has to say about the other Rays’ infieders:

Evan Longoria, the team’s top pick in 2006, is expected to be the starting third baseman, though he may not open the season there. When he arrives, Akinori Iwamura will shift to second base. Expect more young pitchers to arrive, including Jeff Niemann and, eventually, David Price, the No. 1 overall pick in this year’s draft.

Obviously, the best is yet to come for the Rays, and it’s coming from the team’s farm system and it’s coming soon. The worst? That’s already gone. The Rays sent troubled OF Elijah Dukes to the Nationals for a 20 year-old southpaw starter named Glenn Gibson, who probably won’t contribute this season. But the karma benefits of a Dukes-less team should help the Rays in 2008.

Acquisitions: Cliff Floyd, Troy Percival, Matt Garza, Jason Bartlett, Willy Aybar, Eduardo Morlan

Losses: Delmon Young, Elijah Dukes, Brendan Harris, Casey Fossum, Jae Seo

Projected Lineup and Rotation:
C - Dioner Navarro
1B - Carlos Pena
2B - Akinori Iwamura
SS - Jason Bartlett
3B - Evan Longoria
LF - Carl Crawford
CF - B.J. Upton
RF - Cliff Floyd/Rocco Baldelli/Jonny Gomes
DH - Cliff Floyd/Rocco Baldelli/Jonny Gomes

SP - Scott Kazmir
SP - Jamie Shields
SP - Matt Garza
SP - Andy Sonnanstine/Edwin Jackson/Jeff Niemann/Jason Hammel/J.P. Howell
SP - Andy Sonnanstine/Edwin Jackson/Jeff Niemann/Jason Hammel/J.P. Howell

Setup: Al Reyes
Closer: Troy Percival

Offseason Grade: B

This isn’t the year the Rays win the East. But next year could be. And in general the future is very bright. Tampa Bay has the best farm system in baseball. And, this summer, they again have the number one pick in the amateur draft.

- Hot Offseason Action Index -

If you’re a fan of the New York Mets, you’re probably pretty excited about the team’s trade for Johan Santana. This is a big day for you. Enjoy it.If you’re a fan of one of the other NL East teams, particularly the Braves or Phillies, you’re probably pretty bummed that one of your rivals just landed a two-time Cy Young winner. But allow me to throw a little sunshine down on this seemingly dark news.There are a number of ways that the Johan Santana trade could mean more bad than good for Mets fans. Let’s count them:

1. Santana, after signing a seven-year $140 million extension, could get hurt. Moreover, he may already be hurt. The Twins’ ace didn’t have his usual stuff down the stretch in 2007. That could be indicative of an injury. But don’t take my word for it. Here’s what Buster Olney had to say about Santana’s 2007 finish:

I talked with evaluators and scouts with three other teams since then, and they all saw the exact same thing in Santana: diminishment in velocity, relatively few sliders thrown, subpar (for Santana) performances. But two of the three believe the regression could be attributed to the Twins not being in the race, Minnesota not playing in a high-adrenalin situation, and Santana coping with a cracked nail. The third evaluator wonders, too, if Santana is OK. “If a deal is made, you could see there would be a complete physical, given the money involved,” said the evaluator.

So, there’s that to look forward to — the possibility that Santana could be in line for a major surgery. Oh, if wishing made it so!

2. Santana eats his way out of town. Can’t you just see it? He works hard all his life to finally land that fat contract. After he gets the contract, he relaxes…and gets fat. It’s happened to so many ballplayers: Fernando Valenzuela, Curt Schilling, El Guapo…the list goes on and on. Have you seen Pedro Martinez lately? That guy looks like he landed a Krispy Kreme endorsement. If Johan starts eating meals with Pedro, watch out. Before you know it, Santana will be wearing a mumu and won’t be able to fit in any of the seats on the team’s private jet.

3. Santana pulls a David Beckham, invents a mysterious, nagging injury, and then dedicates himself to embracing his status as a gay icon by spending all his time going to fabulous parties and modeling underwear. What’s that you say? You didn’t know Santana was a gay icon? Well, he’s a Met, isn’t he?

After months of speculation, the Twins have agreed to trade Johan Santana to the Mets for a package of young players—if, and only if, the Mets can sign Santana to a long-term deal in the next 72 hours. Since Santana has already rejected a 4 year, $80 million extension offered by Minnesota, he’s rumored to be looking for a six- or seven-year deal from New York, in the range of $20 million per.

If the Mets can make this happen, they will give up outfielder Carlos Gomez and pitchers Phil Humber, Kevin Mulvey and Deolis Guerra. The Mets managed to hang on to their most prized prospect, outfielder Fernando Martinez. Bob Nightengale at USA Today, who first broke the story, calls Gomez a five-tool player, notes that he’s worked hard to cut down on his strikeouts, and sees him taking over in centerfield for the Twins. However, Rotoworld has a different take:

Gomez and Guerra are big-time talents, but Gomez lacks plate discipline and might not fit in the top half of the lineup and an awful lot could go wrong before Guerra even sniffs the majors. Mulvey and Humber are third starters at best and probably more like fourths. It’s a whole lot better than losing Santana for draft picks next winter, but we’d have taken a Phil Hughes or Jacoby Ellsbury package over this.

And as SI’s John Heyman notes, the current deal is the same offer the Mets made weeks ago.

For a hotly anticipated trade, this is deal is about as surprising as your average romantic comedy. The Yankees had already publicly announced their withdrawal from the auction, and the only other team rumored to be in the bidding was the Red Sox—who seemed involved only to keep the Yankees at bay. Could there be any doubting the ultimate betrothal of Johan Santana and the New York Mets?

Appropriate reactions now that this inevitable-for-weeks deal has finally gone down:

Mets fans: YEHAW!

Rest of NL East: *shudder.*

Yankee fans: Poop.

Red Sox fans: Phew.

Twins fans: Motherf***er.

Yesterday, the Phillies signed 3B Pedro Feliz. But they got far more than just a gold glove fielder. The Phillies got a player who dabbles in unfortunate facial hair the way Charlie Sheen dabbles in Vegas hookers. The way Amy Winehouse dabbles in coke. The way Britney dabbles in crazy.Truth be told, I haven’t spent a ton of time watching Feliz, since he played for the Giants, a team that has always been in a different time zone and lately has been far from contention. But with yesterday’s trade, I had new reason to gaze upon the visage that is Feliz. And lo, what I did see!

First, on Philadelphia Inquirer baseball writer Todd Zolecki’s blog, I got a glipse of Feliz rocking the chin strap.

Then, I Googled a nice pic of Feliz with what looks to be a still-in-progress chin strap. I’ve seen 13-year-olds with fuller beards.

Then, I took to Flickr, where I discovered a photo of Feliz with a soul strip, a look he no doubt borrowed from one Doug Davis.

Finally, here he is with a couple of female fans, rocking a combination of barely-there mustache and chin fuzz. The chin fuzz says, “got a tin can I can munch on?” while the almost-stache says, “Hi, my name is McLovin and I’d like to buy some beer.”

The reaction to Feliz’s signing in Philly was a collective “meh.” But I suspect he’ll grow on the city of brotherly shove. And even if he doesn’t grow on them, I know something will grow on him.Welcome to the team, Pedro. The UFH team.

How can you tell spring is in the air? Forget Punxsutawney Phil. I know the sap is rising when Manny starts being Manny again.

Training in Tempe, Arizona this offseason, Manny Ramirez is conveniently located for this weekend’s Super Bowl in Glendale. But he’s not going to just take the day off, no sir. According to WZLX in Boston, his agent is calling around town to the various Patriots bars in the area, asking them if they’d like to have the 2004 World Series MVP drop by during the game.

For $10,000.*

Now, you may be asking yourself, why would a man who makes twenty million dollars a year scrounge around under the seat cushions for that kind of chump change? Why would Manny Ramirez, who, we’ve been told, is shy, want to spend Super Bowl Sunday with a bunch of drunk Pats fans when he could spend it with his Hot Baseball Wife and Cute Baseball Babies? And if he needed ten grand, why wouldn’t he just sell some more stuff on eBay? But these are foolish questions, baseball fans. As we should know by now, Manny is as Manny does.

I just hope that wherever he watches the Super Bowl, he doesn’t see his shadow. I’m not ready for six more weeks of winter.

* Note of comparison: Maybe Manny should ask for more money. After all, Paris Hilton, Mariah Carey, and Britney Spears command appearance fees well into the six figures. Even Kim Kardashian gets $75k for party appearances, and I still don’t know why she’s famous.

Update: We’re all done!!

Let us know if you find any bugs (or any other weirdness) on the site at get [at] umpbump [dot] com

***

To a new hosting provider that is.

We’re in the process of moving our files and database to a better and faster host; as far as we’ve been informed by the support team at our new home, the process will be seamless. However, we’d like to let you guys know in case a hiccup should present itself.

If anything, the domain might not respond for a few minutes while the DNS records get updated, but all should be back to normal by tomorrow.

Thanks!

Joe Posnanski’s blog is always great reading. Yesterday, he had a doozy on where the Royals stand in the chase for Santana. I won’t spoil it, but here’s the rub:

I decided to write my own, “Hey, now the Royals are in the Santana chase,” story. I got to Royals general manager Dayton Moore and asked, “Hey, why can’t you guys go get Johan Santana?”

He responded, basically, by suggesting that was not exactly one of the world’s great questions.

But you will notice … that’s not a denial. Am I right or am I right?

So here’s my story:KANSAS CITY — Kansas City Royals general manager Dayton Moore on Wednesday did not deny that his team is very close to completing a trade for Minnesota Twins ace Johan Santana.

And we go from there.

It’s definitely worth a read, especially if it’s 6 pm Eastern on a Friday and you’re still stuck at the office.