If you’re a fan of the New York Mets, you’re probably pretty excited about the team’s trade for Johan Santana. This is a big day for you. Enjoy it.If you’re a fan of one of the other NL East teams, particularly the Braves or Phillies, you’re probably pretty bummed that one of your rivals just landed a two-time Cy Young winner. But allow me to throw a little sunshine down on this seemingly dark news.There are a number of ways that the Johan Santana trade could mean more bad than good for Mets fans. Let’s count them:
1. Santana, after signing a seven-year $140 million extension, could get hurt. Moreover, he may already be hurt. The Twins’ ace didn’t have his usual stuff down the stretch in 2007. That could be indicative of an injury. But don’t take my word for it. Here’s what Buster Olney had to say about Santana’s 2007 finish:
I talked with evaluators and scouts with three other teams since then, and they all saw the exact same thing in Santana: diminishment in velocity, relatively few sliders thrown, subpar (for Santana) performances. But two of the three believe the regression could be attributed to the Twins not being in the race, Minnesota not playing in a high-adrenalin situation, and Santana coping with a cracked nail. The third evaluator wonders, too, if Santana is OK. “If a deal is made, you could see there would be a complete physical, given the money involved,” said the evaluator.
So, there’s that to look forward to — the possibility that Santana could be in line for a major surgery. Oh, if wishing made it so!
2. Santana eats his way out of town. Can’t you just see it? He works hard all his life to finally land that fat contract. After he gets the contract, he relaxes…and gets fat. It’s happened to so many ballplayers: Fernando Valenzuela, Curt Schilling, El Guapo…the list goes on and on. Have you seen Pedro Martinez lately? That guy looks like he landed a Krispy Kreme endorsement. If Johan starts eating meals with Pedro, watch out. Before you know it, Santana will be wearing a mumu and won’t be able to fit in any of the seats on the team’s private jet.
3. Santana pulls a David Beckham, invents a mysterious, nagging injury, and then dedicates himself to embracing his status as a gay icon by spending all his time going to fabulous parties and modeling underwear. What’s that you say? You didn’t know Santana was a gay icon? Well, he’s a Met, isn’t he?