8 Responses to “Write Your Own Caption: Daisuke’s football”

  1. Sarah Green says:

    Having lived in Boston for less than a year when the Patriots took their bid for a perfect season all the way to the Super Bowl, only to lose in heartbreaking fashion late in the fourth quarter, Red Sox hurler Daisuke Matsuzaka nonetheless felt crushed by the loss.

    “I blame myself,” Daisuke Matsuzaka told reporters through an interpreter. “If only I had practiced a bit harder, the Patriots would not have lost everything with just 0:35 left on the clock.”

    Matsuzaka announced plans to keep practicing “tirelessly.” Red Sox manager Terry Francona could not be reached for comment.

  2. Brian Sadecki says:

    “Who’s that fat, overrated guy?” queried the football.

  3. Sarah Green says:

    Daisuke Matsuzaka played catch in Fort Myers, FL with Jessica Simpson (not pictured). Reached for comment, Red Sox Nation screamed in agony.

  4. There will be a period of adjustment for the Japanese pitcher, who must adjust to the American ball, which is slightly larger and oblong.

  5. It’s like watching people talk in a Godzilla movie, everything’s is just a little off.

  6. Dice-K Tears his Dice-ACL trying to catch a terrible throw from now-injured Curt Schilling. This comes just hours after we got word that Josh Beckett and Clay Buccholtz got drunk on a ranch in Texas and were captured crossing the border in to Mexico. Lester and Wakefield will now be starting 81 games each this year.

  7. In other new today, the Patriots paid 51.1 million for negotiating rights with Daisuke Matsuzaka

  8. Coach screaming to Dice-K: “Keep your eye on the ball numb-nuts!!!! Don’t be like Randy because you’re scared to get hit!”

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