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Go Phils!

So I look at the leaderboards today, and I notice that White Sox leftfielder Carlos Quentin has already been plunked 6 times this year, and is on pace to get nailed 39 times by the end of the season. If he could maintain that pace, he would be in pretty elite company – the all time record for HBP in a season is Ron Hunt’s astonishing 50 in 1971, followed by Don Baylor’s 35 in 1986, and Craig Biggio’s 34 in 1997.

Of course, that plucky munchkin David Eckstein has also been plunked 6 times so far, and Reed Johnson of the Cubs has been hit 5 times, but who is most likely to keep up the insane pace?

The answer is clearly Quentin, who has already demonstrated that he is the greatest at getting hit by pitches in the history of the game. So far in his pro career, Carlos Quentin has been hit by a pitch every 16 plate appearances. This is an insanely high rate, when you consider that modern master Biggio was hit every 43.8, 80’s champ Baylor was plunked every 35.2, and HBP god Ron Hunt was hit “only” every 25.3 plate appearances.

In 2004, Quentin set the all-time minor league record for getting hit by the pitch by getting plunked 43 times across 2 levels, and in 2005, he set the all-time Pacific Coast League record for HBP by getting hit 29 times.

And Quentin’s propensity for getting hit by the pitch didn’t just start in the pros either. When I was at Stanford, he set the NCAA Division I record by getting hit by 5 pitches in a single game against Florida State. 5 plate appearances, 5 HBP! That was insane.

So get used to seeing images like the photo above, because going forward, if Quentin can avoid the injury bug that has plagued him thus far in his major league career, you can expect him to mount a serious threat to Ron Hunt’s record each and every season.

Is it really only Wednesday? Alas, so it would seem. Let’s have some lunchtime linkage:

Barry Zito needs himself a slumpbuster. BabesLoveBaseball has some suggestions.

If that doesn’t work out, the Fresno Beehive would like him to come to Fresno. The AAA Grizzlies need an ace, Barry!

Another installment in Deadspin’s excellent series of horrifying moments in sports journalism, this post features a deaf Ken Griffey Jr, a naked Jay Buhner, and a mostly-naked Lou Piniella.

The 25th anniversary of Lee Elia’s famous tirade (Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin’ world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here!) brought you by FanIQ.

Do-gooding HBW alert: Kelli Pedroia.

Beyond the Box Score says Ryan Zimmerman’s not sucky, just unlucky.

Some great ballparks to check out for that minor league road trip you’ve been planning, courtesy of Bus Leagues Baseball.

Boston’s DL payroll exceeded the payroll of the entire Marlins ballclub. But hey, at least it was cheaper than New York’s DL payroll. (Center Field)

And as always, I like to read good stuff. So if you have some, share it.

The Detroit Tigers have a stacked lineup, but their pitching has been a glaring weakness. Their bullpen, which many pointed to as a flaw before the start of the season, could certainly be better, but it’s not the problem right now.

“Everyone talks about the bullpen being a soft spot but I don’t think it’s fair to say that yet,” said manager Jim Leyland. “It’s not like they have been blowing leads. Heck, we haven’t had leads to blow.”

Leyland was actually talking about his team’s lackluster hitting, but he might as well have been talking about their starting pitching, which has been a black hole of suckery so far this season. Four of their starters have ERAs of over 6.00. And two of those have ERAs of over 7.00. Everyone, even staff ace Justin Verlander, has been downright awful. But what kind of awful? Let’s take a look.

1) No durability. Heading into tonight’s games, the other AL pitching staffs had between 16 and 12 quality starts. Detroit’s staff had 4. (Two of those have come from Armando Galarraga, who could be sent back to the minors at any moment.) Detroit’s only major winter addition to the pitching staff, Dontrelle Willis, is currently on the DL with a hyperextended knee. Another key piece of their starting rotation, Kenny Rogers, is 43 years old, and has been unable to go five innings in three of his five starts.

2) No control. The league average for walks? 92. Detroit’s total? 119, good for second in the AL, right behind the god-awful Texas Rangers. Detroit is also second-worst when it comes to WHIP, K/BB, and hit batsmen.

3) A lot of earned runs allowed. In terms of team ERA, Detroit’s 5.03 is second to last in the league, saved again from being last by the craptastic Rangers.

4) No domination. The Tigers are 10th the league in K/9. They ain’t fooling nobody.

5) No efficiency. Detroit pitchers have the second most pitches per plate appearance of any AL staff.

And lest you think it’s just bad luck, their pitching staff’s BABIP is .280, pretty darn close to the average.

Expect them to be eager buyers in July.

Yesterday, Paul sent an email to the Umpbump staff, announcing the day’s big news: Newsday was reporting that Roger Clemens was banging a country singer. The following is the contents of the resulting email thread.

Sarah: WHOAH! This is huge! Peter Gammons has, I think, touted Clemens as the ultimate faithful husband when all his teammates were sleeping with groupies!

Coley: Sarah, can you track down that Peter Gammons article? I think that would be something people would find interesting.

Sarah: You know, i may have been mistaken about that. I read later that it was Canseco who said that in his book…so while I do have this memory of hearing it from the lips of P-Gam, he may only have been repeating the words of Canseco. Or I just screwed up who said it in my mind, making this the first time anyone has ever confused Peter Gammons with Jose Canseco. Either way, I don’t think Gammons put it in an article. I think he was just talking. But they did write a book together back in the 80s.

Sarah: Also, this guy is a total douchebag. It’s a huge non story?!?! What planet is he on?

Paul: All Wallace Matthews ever does is complain. He’s one of the top examples of why mainstream NYC sports media sucks. Well, him and Mike & the Maddog.

Sarah: This may be my favorite line:

“The fact that she was 15 and he 28? Well, that one is a little tougher to get around, but these days, 15 is the new 30.”

Gross, gross, gross!

“With all due respect to my good friends at the New York Daily News, aside from the age of his alleged mistress at the time of their meeting, this is one big non-story, important to all of four people on planet Earth – Mindy McCready, the woman in question; Brian McNamee, who is being sued by Clemens for defamation; and Mr. and Mrs. Roger Clemens of Katy, Texas.”

Right, and Congress! And anyone who read the Mitchell Report! And anyone who watched Clemens’ testimony on television!!!!

And why does he keep talking about Miley Cyrus?! Has she really invaded every last corner of the earth?!?

Coley: Sarah, now that Miley Cirus has been photographed wearing a sheet, it’s now permissable to have sex with 15-year-old girls. Didn’t you hear?

[Scandalous Miley Cyrus photos after the jump. Go on, click it. You know you want to. Perv.]

Read the rest of this entry »

The Week 4 results are in for UmpBump’s head-to-head league. Who’s up, who’s down, who’s in, who’s out.

Sarah: After inflicting a veritable ass-kicking on Alejandro for most of the week, I (again!) suffered a terrible Sunday and had to content myself with a tie. Poop. Now I’ve dropped down to sixth in our 12-person league, my worst showing so far. You know what really grates? If I’d just taken a gamble and played Kyle Lohse yesterday, I would have won. But I benched him, because I was already winning nearly all the pitching categories and I thought he would only screw it up. Of course, Lohse pitched a beaut, but none of it counted for the Somerville Green Sox. Disgusting. Hot: Jacoby Ellsbury, Russell Martin, David Murphy, Yovani Gallardo, Kyle Freakin’ Lohse. Not: Andy Pettitte, Johnny Cueto, Carlos Guillen, Vernon Wells.

Coley: Well, things can’t get much worse. I got handed an 11-1 beatdown this week. And it hurt. A lot. The problem is clearly my offense, which is getting routinely smacked around, especially in RBI and HR. I’m going to have to pull the trigger on a trade, maybe swap some speed for some power, if possible. You know who isn’t helping? Jose Reyes. He was terrible this week. And, frankly, he’s been bad all year. So, is it time to trade him? Or do I ride it out? And for how long? My pitching staff (Aaron Harang, Dice-K, Brett Myers, Jered Weaver and Oliver Perez) wasn’t great this week, either. But I’m not worried about my pitching. That’s a loaded staff. Hot: Brandon Phillips, Josh Hamilton. Not: Jose Reyes, Carlos Pena, Chone Figgins, Brett Myers.

Paul: Cliff. Lee. That is all. (Actually, if I left it at that, Sarah would kill me.) Anyhow, on the heels of yet another improbably brilliant outing by the Cleveland lefty, ElDuquesInjuryReport now stands atop the standings in out humble league. But even more welcome were the two outings by Cleveland’s other lefty, C.C. Sabathia, who appears to have put his terrible start to the year behind him. Offensively, Edwin Encarnacion had a pretty big week (6 runs, 2 HRs, 19TBs and .379 OBP), as did Brian Roberts (6 runs, 2 HRs, 2 SBs, 17 TBs and .407 OBP). The next victim in my Winnebago tour of carnage is Bryan (Pirates in ‘08!). Sir, you are about to enter a world of pain. Hot: C.C. Sabathia, Cliff Lee, Jhonny Peralta (Indians galore!), Brian Roberts, Edwin Encarnacion. Not: Kevin Youkilis, David Wright, Scott Baker.

Alejandro: After surging last week, my team found itself in the woodshed being taken to school by Green’s Somerville’s Green Sox. For any of you who know a little bit about soccer or hockey, you know a come-from behind tie brings about a good feeling of accomplishment. I have to point out Francisco Liriano, on whom I took a big gamble, along with like 90%+ of Yahoo! fantasy players, lost big time. Needless to say, I dropped him, frankly because I don’t expect to get any results out of him, whereas I could by taking a smaller gamble on someone like the Cardinals’ Todd Wellemeyer, 2-0 , 3.77 era, 31 k , 10bb, 1.13 whip. Hot: Chipper Jones, Hunter Pence, Magglio Ordóñez, Tim Lincecum (stud), Billy Wagner, Josh Becket (13k’s!). Not: Kevin Milwood, Gavin Floyd (don’t give up on him yet!), Francisco Liriano (dropped).

This week, Nick wondered aloud what the Washington Nationals would look like, if only they had spent some money to retain former prospects like Brandon Phillips, Jason Bay or Javier Vasquez, instead of trading them for more affordable pieces.

But it was Melissa, a frequent Umpbump commenter, who caught my attention with this seemingly innocent line:

Now that (The Nationals) have a new stadium and are operating in a bigger market they should have the resources to keep their own talent….

That comment reminded me that, last we checked, the Nationals weren’t selling many tickets to games at the new stadium.  But, now that the weather has warmed up, they must be drawing better, right?

In a word, no.

So far this year, the Nats are averaging 30,347 fans per game, in a park that holds 41,888. This season, they’ve sold 18,000 season tickets, an increase of 3,000 since the team moved from Montreal to D.C. But the Nationals had a season-ticket base of about 22,500 in their first season at RFK in 2005, meaning the club has lost the equivalent of 4,500 season ticket holders since then.

What lessons can we learn from this? First of all, that new stadiums aren’t the draw that they used to be. When Oriole Park at Camden Yards opened in 1992, spectators packed the park. Orioles’ attendance, routinely below 25,000 at Memorial Stadium, soared above 40,000 at the new park and remained there for nine seasons. Cleveland’s Jacobs Field (now Progressive Field) opened in 1994 and had a run of 455 consecutive sellouts. But the thrill of new, retro ballparks is gone. The Nationals are learning the hard way that it now takes more than just a new stadium to attract fans. It takes … drumroll please … a competitive team. Or Barry Bonds.

What does this mean for the Nationals? I think it casts real doubt on the assertion that Washington’s new stadium will lead to increased resources. Moreover, since the Orioles control the TV broadcasting rights to all of theNationals’ games, Washington seems like a longshot to achieve big-market status anytime soon – if ever.

I’m not an economist, but I think the Nats’ situation can be boiled down to this catch-22: The fans won’t show up unless the team improves, and the team can’t afford better players unless the fans show up.

So if Washington is going to win, they’re going to have to do it the hard way – the small market way. I think it’s time for Stan Kasten to buy himself a copy of Moneyball.