The Week 1 results are in for the UmpBump fantasy league. A quick look at how we did:

Sarah: I’m a fantasy baseball virgin, and I feel no shame in admitting that for me, our draft largely consisted of a lot of flustered hand-flapping. Yet I did manage to do some things right, and with a bit of roster-shuffling I managed to win my match-up and come in fifth in the league. Eric Gagne contributed both a save and a win, despite himself, but I got torched in all the pitching averages. In hopes of remedying this, I used my No. 2 waiver priority to pick up Johnny Cueto. (Incidentally, Cueto was my 2008 NL ROY pick. I was going to get him on the sly as soon as he became available, but since Cueto didn’t play along with this scheme, I had to use my No. 2 waiver priority to get him.) Hot: Rickie Weeks, James Loney, Xavier Nady, Carlos Guillen, J.D. Drew, and finally, after an ice-cold start, Ryan Braun. Not: Russell Martin, Troy Glaus, Jacoby Ellsbury, and Justin Verlander.

Coley: You know why my team tied this week? Because I lost the steals category. I have Chone Figgins, Jose Reyes and Brandon Phillips on my team. I should never lose steals. But Reyes didn’t steal a single base this week. Hot: Todd Helton, Josh Hamilton; Aaron Harang and Dice-K both rebounded after shaky first starts. Not: Brett Myers. This is why I generally don’t pick Phillies players for my fantasy team. Myers is going to ruin both my real team and my fantasy team.

Alejandro: Man what is it about my Fantasy Teams that at some point find themselves in dead f#*%@g last place! Well, let me count the ways. First of all, my pitching went south all thanks to Mr. Josh Beckett, Mr. Barry Zito, and Mr. Dontrelle Willis, who each gave up a boatload of runs in their respective starts. Oh and it doesn’t help that two of my closers, Joe Borowski and Kerry Wood have a collective ERA over 6. But then, when I thought my offense was going to bail me out, Magglio Ordoñez single-handedly cost me wins. He had zero RBI, zero Runs, zero HR, zero Stolen Bases, and a grand whopping total of 9 bases. I lost 3 categories by 1 point! Hot: Alex Gordon, A.J. Pierzynksi (who I picked up), Chipper Jones, Hanley Ramirez, Carlos Lee, Tim Lincecum. Mild: I guess Kerry Wood and Borowski, who got me three and two saves respectively, deserve some love. Not: Magglio Ordoñez, Josh Beckett, Juan Pierre, Dontrelle Willis, Barry Zito (who I dropped).

Paul: I have a few cardinal rules for fantasy baseball: 1) Don’t pay for saves. 2) Don’t pay for steals. 3) Don’t really pay attention to season stats until June. 4) Trust the guys you drafted – you took them for a reason.

With that said, I couldn’t drop Bill Hall fast enough. I drafted him in the 21st round thinking that it might be useful having a guy who qualifies at 3rd and CF sitting on my bench. Then I remembered after the draft that he was Bill Hall. So I swapped him for Adam Jones, a guy who literally made me think for fifteen minutes as to whether or not he or Daric Barton was going to be AL ROY. Speaking of Barton, I also picked him up and dropped Joey Votto once I learned that Scott Hatteberg was starting at first on Opening Day. I just don’t trust that Dusty Baker. And I also had to DL Scott Kazmir, which allowed me to pick up Andy Sonnanstine. I don’t know what it is about those Tampa Bay Mephistopherays pitchers (I can’t lay claim to that phrase by the way) this year, but I’m liking their chances.

And since it was my team that sent Alejandro to the cellar once more, I had a pretty good week at his expense. Hot: Chris B. Young (7 R, 3 HR, 2 SB, 16 TB), Kosuke Fukudome (5 R, 5 RBI, 14 TB, .542 OBP), Jake Peavy (2 W, 12 K, 0.56 ERA, 0.56 WHIP). Not: Matt Holliday (1 R, 1 RBI, .280 OBP). C.C. Sabathia (0 W, 7.59 ERA, 1.78 WHIP), Shane Victorino (1 R, 2 RBI, 5 TB, .167 OBP).

One Response to “UmpBump’s Week 1 Fantasy Results”

  1. You’ll all be looking up at me by season’s end.

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