In retrospect, this should’ve been a liveblog. Oh well.

From: Paul

To: UmpBump Staff

2:21 pm (Eastern Daylight Time)

So I’m following the game on MLB Gamecast here at work today. I just wanted to report that all of Jamie Moyer’s fastballs are showing up as “changeup” on the pitch type. Yes, he’s that slow.

From: Coley

2:25 pm

I just blogged that there’s talk that there could be a fight at the game today. But then I realized, there is 50 percent less of a chance than usual, because you can’t get mad when Jamie Moyer hits you with a pitch.

From: Sarah

2:38 pm

I just ducked out of work to listen to the first inning of the Sox-Tigers game in my car radio. With Kenny Rogers on the mound, I couldn’t figure out why the announcers weren’t talking about the game. “What’s happening?? Why aren’t they calling the pitches?!?!” I needn’t have fretted. Turns out, Rogers is just working thaaaaaat…..slooooow.

From: Coley

2:44 pm

Uh oh, here comes the heart of the order: Utley, Howard, Burrell. Unbelievably, the Mets have to be the most afraid of Burrell. He’s hitting .400 so far this season. He hit two homers yesterday. And he kills the Mets.

From: Sarah

2:48 pm

A balk! Rogers balked!

From: Coley

2:55 pm

So did Oliver Perez. And then he threw a wild pitch. And now they just pulled him. This is vintage Perez. He’s cruising. He’s retires Utley and Howard. Two outs in the sixth. He’s thrown 88 pitches. Then he walks Burrell. Then he balks. Then he throws a wild pitch. And now he’s gone.

From: Sarah

2:57 pm

Rogers has thrown five pitches in this at-bat to Youk, who has yet to take his bat off his shoulder. There’s been roughly 45 minutes between each pitch. Ah, he walked him on pitch No. 6.

From: Paul

3:00 pm

Ollie’s got no zip today. Plus, he only struck out two. Not vintage OP. But aside from that, yeah. Yeah, that sounds about right.

From: Sarah

3:12 pm

Why didn’t I leave work to watch this game at home? Manny just TRIPLED. And scored on a a throwing error. All at once. That’s practically an inside the park home run.

From: Paul


Can the Tigers do anything right?

From: Sarah

3:18 pm

That *is* the question, isn’t it? Dice-K’s allowed one hit through three. No walks. Three K’s. And he’s working pretty quickly. I just hope he can stay in a rhythm if Kenny Rogers is going to go up there and take an hour for each of his frames.

From: Coley

3:27 pm

Sarah, I would caution you about getting too excited over the Sox. Sure, they’re playing well today, but it might not matter if Baltimore never loses again!

Ryan Howard up with the bases loaded and one out. Ground ball to first. Delgado fields it and throws home…wildly! Rollins scores! Victorino scores! Utley to second! Tie game! still one out for Mets killer Pat The Bat Burrell!

From: Paul

3:29 pm

Come on, we’ve now got Jorge Sosa on the mound. I mean, how could THAT go wrong? Dude is LOCKDOWN.


From: Coley


And the Phillies take the lead, 3-2.

From: Sarah

3:44 pm

So Julio Lugo actually did something right, partially because the Tigers are so snakebitten now. Reached on an infield single and then to second on a throwing error by Miguel Cabrera. (Scored after a single by Pedroia and a sac fly from Youk.)

Last inning, Dice-K issued his first walk but quickly erased it by inducing a DP.

Only issue I see with Boston today is all their baserunning is station-to-station, except for when Detroit commits a hideous error. They’ve got Crisp and Lugo in the lineup…why not running more aggressively?

From: Sarah


Dice-K led off the next inning with a walk to M-Cab, then got a K and a fly out, then a single (on which Cabrera ran first-to-third) and then I was reduced to watching in horror as a Brandon Inge “in-play” ball went back…back….I thought that little blue dot would sail on forever….before it became an “x” and a fly out.

GameCast is scawee.

On a different note, did you guys notice the reordering of the baseball payrolls this year?

Yankees: 209,081,577

Mets: 137,793,376

Tigers: 137,685,196

Red Sox: 133,390,035

From: Paul

4:02 pm

I did see that. The Evil Empire reigns supreme.

By the way, it will never, ever, ever, ever, ever make sense to me as to why you put closers in with a three run lead but you don’t put them in during a late inning situation when everyone else in your bullpen is already overworked. Wagner’s pitched in one game so far. Why not put him in???

From: Sarah

4:03 pm

I just wanted to demonstrate that Detroit and the Mets have surpassed Boston in payroll now. (The fact that the Yankees are 1st is yawntastic to me.)

From: Paul

4:05 pm

It wasn’t a surprise that the Sox were in fourth. But the disparity between the Yanks and #2 is pretty insane. That $70m is more than 11 MLB teams payrolls. Also surprising – there are 11 teams with payrolls above 100 million. Including the Cards and Braves. Also, the White Sox aren’t too far behind Boston either.

From: Sarah

4:10 pm

You know, Paul, I had been touting that big gap between the #1 and #2 payrolls for all the years that Boston was #2, but no one ever seemed to care. Anyway, now it’s your problem. Nyah nyah!

Crap. Dice-K getting tired. Just gave up an infield single to Gary Sheffield. How does Sheff still have that much speed???

From: Paul

4:20 pm

He can’t be that tired can he? It’s only the sixth and he’s under 100.

From: Sarah

4:31 pm

Well, he gave up back to back singles and another walk. He was really on a roll earlier in the game, so it seemed like he was tiring. Remember, it’s only April!

From: Paul

4:35 pm

True. But Jake Peavy and Pine Tar combined for a shutout a couple of days ago.

From: Sarah

4:40 pm

Manny and Ortiz are really giving it to Grilli. David Ortiz just worked him for a walk on a bunch of pitches and Manny just fouled off pitch #7 of his at-bat.

You know, say what you will about the crappy play of the Tigers in this game (no runs as of yet, two errors), but so far they have managed to prevent Boston from having a big inning. The Sox have scored 4 runs, but only 1 per inning despite having seven hits and four walks. This is a bit worrisome to me. Boston can’t keep stranding guys on base! Fret, fret. Worry, worry.

Okay, make it six walks. One to Lowell with two on, and another (on 4 pitches) to Drew to force in a run.

From: Paul

4:46 pm

Sarah, that’s kind of a backhanded compliment isn’t it? Basically, it’s similar to saying “The Tigers aren’t that bad! They’re only losing by four runs to my Red Sox! Good for them!”

I kid.

From: Sarah

4:47 pm

The fact is that no matter what the other team is doing, I and the other Fenwegians will always find a way to fret about our Red Sox.

I give up on working. My boss just left. Now I will too. Freedom!!!!!!!!!

From: Coley

5:01 pm (2:01 in Tucson)

I just got back from lunch to find that the Phils won! And the Red Sox game will never end!

From: Paul

5:10 pm

Coley, you left during the game? Lame.

From: Coley

5:15 pm

Paul, I’m not a Dodgers fan. I didn’t walk out of the stadium in the seventh inning. I left the ESPN Gamecast. And, let’s face it…once the Phils took the lead, they were not letting go. That’s just how we roll in the city of brotherly shove.

From: Sarah

5:19 pm

I am at home now, watching the game on TV, and drinking the champagne of beers. This is so much better than GameCast.

Neil Diamond is doing a special performance for the Sweet Caroline 8th inning singalong. (I think it’s prerecorded but I can’t quite tell.) But he’s just sort of of talking his way through it. He can’t sing anymore. He tried to hit a low note and his voice just bottomed out. It’s awful.

From: Paul

5:23 pm

You know who can still sing? Rick Astley.

And Eddie Murphy. Whatzupwitu?

From: Coley

5:25 pm

Sarah, what are your feelings on Buckner throwing out the first pitch today?

From: Sarah

5:29 pm

You know, I thought it was a stupid gimmick, until I actually saw it (I was at the diner around the corner from my office eating lunch, and they had the ceremonies on TV, natch). It was a really nice sight to see. The fans were being really warm and welcoming, and Buckner was visibly brushing tears away. But not in a sappy, lame way. In a manly, sort of Clint Eastwood way. I think he called it a “healing moment” or something. It was really, really nice. I quickly felt like a beeznatch for taking my earlier, cynical stance. Oh, also, there was a really charming moment when he pretended to shake off the catcher before throwing the first pitch. It was very funny and sweet.

From: Sarah

5:35 pm

And the Tigers are 0 for 7. OOOOOOOOOOF.

Whoah! Right after the game they aired the new Dunkin ad for this Papelbon/free coffee promo they’re doing. So much better than the print ad. No video on YouTube yet, alas.

Unfortunately, the butt you see in the commercial is actually the butt of a butt-double. Alas.

8 Responses to “A slow Monday at the office: random thoughts on Mets-Phils, Sox-Tigers, payrolls, GameCast, Bill Buckner, and Papelbon’s butt”

  1. I’ll second Sarah’s Buckner sentiment. That was surprisingly tear-jerking. Almost. Okay, maybe I cried.

  2. Sarah Green says:

    I was…misty. Managed to keep it inside the eyelid, though.

    Blink it back, Sarah! Blink it back!

  3. Lyndsay says:

    where can I find that new payroll list? I’m in the midst of making a point to a friend who is an O’s fan that payroll is not the reason that the sox won and that the O’s are going to blow it this year (that it’s their crappy front office, the lack of quality pitching, and overspending on has-been hitters), and the full list would really help.

  4. Sarah Green says:

    Ah, Lyndsay. It’s the most useful thing ever, totally sortable in so many ways! Here you go.

    Having a bigger payroll increases your odds of getting to the playoffs (more room for error) but doesn’t actually seem to have much effect once you are in the playoffs.

  5. Lyndsay says:

    well really, I just don’t want any other team’s fans to enjoy being in first place, even for a week in April. He knows it’s gonna go south for them any moment now – I just felt like kicking my friend while he’s down. :-) And because I haven’t already taunted him enough with “30 to 3, no-hit by a ROOKIE, and Millar is practically begging to get traded back” every other day since last summer.

  6. Nick Kapur says:

    Aw man! Sarah, you didn’t include the message where Alejandro rickrolled you all!


  7. ok so I am not kidding…an oriole showed up on my lawn this morning as I was leaving for work, and I have never in my life seen one of those birds before. this came a mere 12 hours after schooling my friend, who’s an O’s fan. should I take that as a threat? some sort of omen?

  8. Sarah Green says:

    Lyndsay, I would watch out. Apparently, the birds know where you live!

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