The fantasy season is now in its third month. How our teams—and their stars—did last week:

Sarah: I should have known. No sooner do I start crowing about my unstoppable offense than the fantasy baseball gods look down from their airy perches and decide to smite me for my hubris. The Somerville Green Sox hitters got off to such an anemic start this week that I was pleased just to escape with a 7-5 loss rather than the 10-2 drubbing that earlier seemed to be my fate. My pitchers reverted to their natural, awful state, but I hope that will change, as I used my waiver priority to pick up Clayton Kershaw. Yes, he promptly (and unsurprisingly, really) got rocked by the Mets, but I look forward to his games against the weaker NL offenses. I also revamped my closing staff, dumping part-time-sub Manny Acosta and bad juju-machine Eric Gagne in favor of Brian Wilson and Rafael Soriano. I’ve got more pitching moves to make in the near future, as Pedro Martinez, who I picked up ages ago, is finally set to come off the DL tomorrow. Hot: Jacoby Ellsbury (8 SB!), Ryan Braun (19 TB!), Russell Martin, Xavier Nady. Not: David Murphy (why do I still have him?), James Loney, JD Drew (yes, he had a .462 OBP last week, but only 7 TB because all he does is walk—swing, jackass!), Rickie Weeks (not having the breakout year I had planned on), Carlos Guillen (ouchie), and last week’s hero, Dana Eveland, who got shelled.

Coley: That’s right, I was that guy. I was the guy who drafted Jay Bruce and stashed him on the bench for two months. And you snickered. You thought, “what a reckless use of bench space.” But now who’s laughing? Now who looks smart? Me! Of course, now I’ve got a bit of a problem, though it’s a good problem to have. I’ve got too many outfielders. There’s Milton Bradley, Josh Hamilton, Johnny Damon, Vlad Guererro, Carl Crawford and Jay Bruce. Of course, I could just keep one of them on my bench as insurance. Or I could deal one for pitching. Thoughts? Hot: Jay Bruce, Josh Hamilton, Johnny Damon, Todd Helton, Brad Lidge. Not: Yunel Escobar, Carlos Pena, Jered Weaver.

Alejandro: When it first seemed like my Center Field Stud was finally going to lose after four consecutive weeks of victories, my offense decided to check in. Glad as I was of the offensive prowess of Aaron Rowand, Carlos Lee, and Jermaine Dye, Montefusco’s Revenge didn’t go down quietly, beating me out in 4 out 6 offensive categories. I don’t know how, but my pitching carried the load, returning the favor and wining 5 out 6 stats. The only loss was due to my “bloated” 3.97 era, all thanks to Mr. Mark Hendrickson hitting a wall and getting tagged for 10 freakin’ runs, oh and for B.J. Ryan finally succumbing to statistical trends and blowing a save. Tim Linceum continues to dominate, but the surprise has been Todd Wellemeyer who very quietly is posting very impressive numbers (1-0, 1.29 ERA, 4Ks, 1.14 WHIP – though if I were to trust my colleague Nick Kapur, I should be trading him, like, NOW!). Hot: Aaron Rowand, Jermaine Dye (not really, but he did hit a home run and collected 11 TBs), Tim Lincecum, Todd Wellemeyer, Josh Becket (no wins, but 10 Ks!), Kerry Wood (4 saves and a negligible ZERO era), Jon Garland (another non-winner, 8-Ker, 2.19 ERA). Not: Dan Uggla, A.J. Pierzynksi (what a seesaw), Connor Jackson (boy’s hurting, give him some time).

Paul: Me win. Conquer Sooze and Sooze army (freebase my balls). Win lucky though. ElDuque’sInjuryReport no play good. Pitchers had ERA over 5. Still won Wins, Saves, K, and K/BB, whatever that mean. How that happen? David Wright do good. All-Star. Me Met fan. When Wright do good, make me happy. Shane Victorino good too. Scored thirteen runs on own! WOW! Only got on base safely 13 times all week! Still scored 13! Phillies have big bats! Me still think Brett Myers dumb… Me also bring Randy Winn on team. Matt Holliday hurt. Needed outfielder. Winn outfielder. Good match. But two days later, saw Travis Hafner get dropped. Me clubbed Winn over head with big stick. Winn go sleep. Me dragged Winn to garbage pit. Picked up Pronk instead. Brought Pronk home. Pronk easy name for caveman to say. Bye bye Winn. HOT: David Wright, Shane Victorino, Scott “Cy Young” Kazmir. NOT: Geovany Soto, Edwin Encarnacion, Chris B. Young, Ted Lilly, Hiroki Kuroda.

Standings, with games behind:

1. Paul (ElDuquesInjuryReport) (0)

2. Scott (Utley’s Firm Quads) (5.5)

3. Doug (Swamp Dragons) (9.5)

4. Alejandro (Center Field Stud) (12.5)

5. Sarah (Somerville Green Sox) (14)

6. Kirk (Montefusco’s Revenge) (20)

7. Larry (croutchyoldman) (22)

6. Bryan (Pirates in 08!) (22.5)

9. Ania (Box89RowKKSeat14) (26.5)

10. Sooze (freebase my balls) (29.5)

11. Coley (Crunkball All Stars) (31.5)

12. Caitlin (caitlin grace) (34.5)

12 Responses to “UmpBump’s Week 9 Fantasy Results”

  1. I guess it would be going too far back in time to give them Pedro Martinez, but at the very least they might have kept him longer and traded him for prospects better than *ahem* Carl Pavano. Those prospects may very well have gone on to be Sizemores or Phillipses. Either way, I never realized just how sieve-like they have been at holding on to young talent. Astonishing.

  2. Well you are going a little too far. With all those parts rising, one has to imagine they would have been a better team in 2004 which means no Zimmerman in the 2005 draft.

  3. Now that they have a new stadium and are operating in a bigger market they should have the resources to keep their own talent. The question will be if they can maintain the same level of scouting and player development that they have had in the past. Part of what hurt the franchise in the past was not getting quality prospects back for the players they couldn’t afford to keep. That shouldn’t be as much of an issue now.

  4. Nick Kapur says:

    Ben, you are of course correct. Obviously, to be completely accurate, you would have to try to find out all the draft picks they got as compensation for losing free agents, and also try to somehow estimate what their record would have been in all seasons from 2002 to present, and then guess who they would have drafted in lower slots, but that is maybe sort of just a little impossible.

    I tried to be as accurate as possible, within reason. It took me a pretty long amount of time just to trace through every trade and make sure I could build a team of guys where one guy I wanted hadn’t been latertraded for other guys who were later traded for another guy I wanted! For example, I couldn’t have both Orlando Cabrerra and Austin Kearns on the team, because Brendan Harris was part of both deals.

    So basically, I just tried to make a team of guys the Expos once had in their control that weren’t ever traded for each other or for people who were later traded for another guy. We’re dreaming here anyway, so we don’t have to take it so seriously.

  5. Paul Moro says:

    Nick, couple things:

    One, you can’t blame Minaya for what happened. He knew damned well that once the team was sold, he was out of a job. New owners always want their own guys in there. So what would he have gotten out of trying to build a team that has a chance to win in a few years when there was no way he was going to be around for it? MLB made him a lame-duck GM from the moment he took office.

    Two, I wonder how this roster will stack up against the other teams if this exercise was done for all franchises? I figure it’ll still be better than the Pirates, but if we created best-case scenarios for all teams, would it still make the Nats contenders?

  6. The worst thing here is that under MLB’s control, Minaya oversaw the fire sale – a true fire sale – of the Expos. Trading Bay, Phillips, Sizemore, and Lee in deals where they got nothing in return.

    The crime is that after MLB decided not to contract the team, and awarded the team to DC, MLB gave DC no recompensation for what MLB did to the franchise.

  7. Nick,

    Don’t worry, I was just trying to be a jerk and rain on your analysis. There’s too many variables, but it is kinda cool to look back on the what coulda been with all else being equal. Now if only they had someone over the last couple of years who knew how to draft or for that matter, traded Soriano.

  8. Nick Kapur says:

    Yeah, good points Ben, although I did hear that the Nats had a tremendous 2007 draft, so maybe things are getting better in that department…

  9. I lost, yet still moved up in the standings. I had high hopes for this week, but my pitching let me down and the loss-win-loss-win pattern is holding steady. I took a gamble and traded two of my more reliable pitchers for Lance Berkman, and now that Papi’s injured I am very glad I did. Now I am gonna try my luck at a strategy that a guy in my main league uses, which is to go heavy on RP, including 2 RP who are SP eligible. I’ll likely be weak in wins and K’s, but I should be able to get consistent performance in saves, ERA, WHIP, and K/BB.

  10. Back on the winning side of things, I know you hear me Scott! 3rd place is not too bad, but not where I want to finish.

    I put some pitchers up for sale, but I’m getting turned down left and right. NO luck in giving up Halladay up for a 1B.

    HOT: Reyes, Utley, Beltran, and Mark Reynolds, S. Marcum, Webb

    COLD: Putz, Blanton, Byrnes, J-UP

  11. Nick Kapur says:

    Paul, do you really think Hafner has anything left, or even if he does, that he is worth picking up while he is on the DL?

    And Sarah, it looks like the Braves are going with a closer by committee approach now that Smoltz is back, so your closer woes may yet continue…

  12. Paul Moro says:

    Nick, the old Pronk is gone, never to return. As you may know, guys with his career trajectory and build don’t last very long. But his decline shouldn’t be so precipitous. His Line Drive percentage is up but his BABiP is way down. He’s hitting as many flyballs as he ever did but they’re ending up in infielder’s gloves. He’s still seeing as many pitches as he should. I’m seeing signs of a correction once he’s off the DL. And our league also has two DL spots so he’s stashed away for now. He’s never going to put up MVP numbers ever again, but he should still be more valuable than Winn.

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