• HaroldHecuba: Mike Mussina is EASTERN EUROPEAN, not Italian....

It was lucky Week 13 in the UmpBump Fantasy League. Here’s what befell each of us:

Sarah: The Somerville Green Sox suffered a 9-2 beatdown at the hands of Box89RowKKSeat14, Ania’s team. Although, I have to say, neither of our offenses were very good this week. I only took the RBI category (by a single ribbie) and steals (which I won even though Jacoby Ellsbury hasn’t stolen a base since June 17). Of course, my pitching got lit up again, in what now feels like the norm for the Green Sox, especially Pedro Martinez, by the Yankees, and Matt Cain, by Cleveland. Thank the hardball gods that interleague play is over. Hot: Johnny Cueto, Ian Kinsler, Vernon Wells. Not: Martinez, Cain, Ellsbury, Clayton Kershaw, James Loney, Rickie Weeks.

Paul: This week shouldn’t have been as close a match-up as it ended up being between myself and my fantasy-challenged colleague, Coley Ward. My players racked up a .423 OBP to Coley’s paltry .326 and I won total bases 123-97. Despite this, I still lost runs scored, tied in home runs, and barely won RBIs. So I’m not sure if it was a successful week offensively speaking. It was a mixed bag on the pitching side as well, having a dominant week in my peripheral categories (0.97 WHIP and 3.92 K/BB) but not having those numbers translate into victories in wins or ERA. In short, it was a week that proved the sabermetric axiom regarding sample sizes. No matter how successfully you execute – whether it be by getting on base and hitting for extra bases for batters or walking few and striking out many for pitchers – over a short period of time you may not get the desired result. But if my team can keep dominating those very categories, then I will be just fine over the long haul. Oh, and I ended up winning the week 6-4-2. So… Maybe I shouldn’t be complaining. Hot: David Wright, Adam “I Hate Baseball SO MUCH” Dunn, Matt Holliday, C.C. Sabathia, Justin Duchscherer, Cliff Lee. Not: Greg Smith, Trevor Hoffman, Chris B. Young.

Coley : Paul shouldn’t be complaining. He was lucky I didn’t beat him this week. Josh Hamilton came to the plate yesterday afternoon with the bases loaded and a chance to win the RBI column for the Crunkball All-Stars, but he popped out. And that was ok, because it was still a 3-1 game between the Phillies and the Rangers, still a save situation, and I figured that meant I’d get a save out of either Brad Lidge or C.J. Wilson and I’d win saves for the week. Unfortunately, the Rangers scored three more runs that inning and Wilson came in and pitched in a non-save situation. So Paul, you got lucky. Hot : Mark Teixeira, Jered Weaver, Jair Jurrjens, Dice-K. Not : Chone Figgins, Brett Myers.

Alejandro: I checked the standings early Sunday morning and I found myself down in the count, but definitely not out. I was knocked around all week, was up and down, but kept my head up, and lo and behold, the results are in. My offense surged on its last day and over came the difference for a solid 8-4 victory that places me 4.5 games out of first place. Jermaine Dye (who’s been on a torrid tear) helped the White Sox sweep the Cubs (along side Alexei Ramirez, who’s having a solid season himself). It’ll be a tough week ahead, though, as Chipper Jones and Dan Uggla, and Magglio Ordoñez are hurt. Hot: Hanley Ramirez, Jermaine Dye, Alex Gordon (barely), Josh Beckett, Tim Lincecum, Kerry Wood, B.J. Ryan. Not: Vicente Padilla, Todd Wellemeyer, Eric Chavez, Hunter Pence, A.J. Pierzynski.

Standings (games behind):

  1. Paul – ElDuquesInjuryReport ( – )
  2. Alejandro – Center Field Stud ( 4.5 )
  3. Scott – Utley’s Firm Quads ( 6 )
  4. Doug – Swamp Dragons ( 8.5 )
  5. Sarah – Somerville Green Sox ( 14.5 )
  6. Kirk – Montefusco’s Revenge ( 15 )
  7. Ania – Box89RowKKSeat14 ( 20 )
  8. Larry – croutchyoldman ( 27.5 )
  9. Bryan – Pirates in ‘08! ( 29.5 )
  10. Coley – Crunkball All-Stars ( 30 )
  11. Caitlin – caitlin grace ( 32.5 )
  12. Sooze – freebase my balls ( 34 )

8 Responses to “UmpBump’s Week 13 Fantasy Results”

  1. Sarah Green says:

    You know, I’m getting the funniest feeling right now. Call me crazy, but…do you get the sense we’re being *watched*?!

  2. Ed Wade is watching you.

  3. chromehorse says:

    2 2=5

  4. That’s some good eye-hand coordination there…

  5. Sarah Green says:

    Goddammit, my earpiece is on the fritz again. Come in, HQ…HQ, come in. It sounds like you said there’s a giant eyeball watching me……..WHAT?!

  6. Hey, better door than a window, chubby.

  7. Lyndsay says:

    damn you, Jacoby! quit striking out already!

    (it doesn’t mean I won’t still birth your children – as many as you’d like)

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