• HaroldHecuba: Mike Mussina is EASTERN EUROPEAN, not Italian....

This was a week of hot, UmpBump-on-UmpBump action in our fantasy league. Sarah and Paul went head-to-head, as did Coley and Alejandro. Who won and who lost? And will the tensions destroy UmpBump as we know it?

Sarah: I lost 6-3 to Paul this week after leading 10-2 as late as Thursday. Many of our categories were close:

And yet my team is sinking like a stone in our standings. I feel alone and confused. Hot: Roy Oswalt, Matt Cain, Johnny Cueto (my pitching! finally!), Russell Martin, Xavier Nady, James Loney, J.D. Drew, Matt Kemp, Troy Glaus. Not: the Fates.

Paul:The “smack talk” quote from my Yahoo avatar was stuck on “Things are not going well” since the middle of last week. And they really weren’t. So I was very surprised to see that my team had actually come back from the depths to kick some Massachusetts butt. Yes, ElDuequesInjuryReport defeated Sarah’s Somerville Green Sox by a score of 6-3-2, but in her defense, it was a lot closer than that. In fact, both our teams had great offensive weeks that probably would have kicked the snot out of most other teams in any given week. It just so happened that we played each other while it was happening. Ain’t baseball grand? But there just haven’t been many weeks when Jhonny Peralta has produced so it was nice to take advantage of it. But the real superstar for the week was Matt Holliday who posted great numbers across the board (8 runs, 3 HRs, 10 RBIs, 3SBs, 22 TBs and .500 OBP).That’s just ridonculous. Hot: Geovany Soto, Brian Roberts, David Wright, Jhonny Peralta, Matt Holliday. Not: Kosuke Fukudome, Scott Kazmir.

Coley: My fantasy team lost. But on the plus side, that was probably just because I was too busy proposing to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, the Crunkball All-Stars got thrashed by Alejandro’s team. Again. But fortunately, Suz said yes. So on balance, it was a good week. Word. Hot: Brandon Phillips, Dice-K, my girlfriend. Not: Jack Cust.

Alejandro: I was internally chastised for not talking smack on my continuing surge from the cellar to the top of the standings, and since I made up some more ground this week (half a game, is some ground) I’ll proceed. The Center Field Stud is surging high and fast, watch out ElDuquesInjuryReport because there’s no stopping this. Last week my team faced some adversity with some key players being hurt; it’s tough to keep it up with three of the hottest hitters in the league, Dan Uggla, Magglio Ordoñez and Chipper Jones seeing some bench time (and DL time), but somehow, some way, I gave Coley’s Crunkball All-Stars a solid 8-4 whipping. I have to mention Alexei Ramirez for a second consecutive week as the young Cuban rookie is making quite a push for ROTY honors, he hit two home runs, scored four runs and collected 13 bases; nothing spectacular, but in Uggla’s absence, anything counts. I made some pitching moves because I lost all faith in Mark Hendrickson (and his 9.00 ERA). Vicente Padilla is on the hot seat, so unless he bounces back or I manage to trade him, he gone. Hot: Hanley Ramirez (Mr. Untouchable), A.J. Pierzynksi, Carlos Delgado, Jermaine Dye, Carlos Lee, Tim Lincecum, Kerry Wood, Jon Garland. Not: Billy Wagner, B.J. Ryan, Vicente Padilla, Mark Hendrickson (he gone), Aaron Rowand.

Standings (games behind):

  1. Paul – ElDuquesInjuryReport ( – )
  2. Alejandro – Center Field Stud ( 4 )
  3. Scott – Utley’s Firm Quads ( 7 )
  4. Doug – Swamp Dragons ( 9 )
  5. Kirk – Montefusco’s Revenge ( 13.5 )
  6. Sarah – Somerville Green Sox ( 17.5 )
  7. Ania – Box89RowKKSeat14 ( 22.5 )
  8. Bryan – Pirates in ‘08! ( 28 )
  9. Larry – croutchyoldman ( 32 )
  10. Coley – Crunkball All-Stars ( 33.5 )
  11. Caitlin – caitlin grace ( 34.5 )
  12. Sooze – freebase my balls ( 38.5 )

4 Responses to “UmpBump’s Week 14 Fantasy Results”

  1. Paul Moro says:

    Lame, Coley. Lame. I mean, proposing to your girlfriend? How cliche is that?

    Congrats, man.

    And to the ladies of Tucson, I’m sorry.

  2. Kirk Miller says:

    I’m on vacation in Canada, so not much time to say much except that my team is finally moving up in the standings, which feels rewarding. Can’t wait for Papi to return for the stretch run.

  3. Alejandro Leal says:

    Does that mean we all get invited to the wedding? I want some free booze and food!

  4. Sarah Green says:

    I think it means I get to go to both the bachelor AND the bachelorette parties!! Word, indeed.

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