"I don't know, Doc. People tell me I was born to be a mascot... But I think I'm just a freak...

Hey, Mets fans and players! Are you sick and tired of losing? Are you simply suicidal because you’ve tried everything and don’t know how to make things better?

Don’t fret about the team losing serious ground in the NL East! Because psychologists are here to help!

They offer such professional and brilliant advice as:

“You don’t want to engage in catastrophic thinking, it’s not fruitful,” – Dr. John Murray

“Essentially, if they win the games, they will make it [to the playoffs].” – Dr. Alan Manevitz

You got that? I know it sounds really complicated and you’re probably unfamiliar with these revolutionary ideas. But basically, thinking about the end of the world is not good. And if the Mets win, they win! Thank you, New York Daily News, for making wonderful advice such as these accessible to our puny little brains.

One Response to “This Just Should Not Be Necessary”

  1. You sure that last quote wasn’t Joe Morgan? It sounds exactly like something he’d say and then seem pleased with himself thinking he just dropped some great knowledge upon the baseball world.

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