Not sure if you’ve heard since it went incredibly underreported in the main stream media, but the final game in Yankee Stadium was played this past Sunday. And you know that means, right?
First, we have this magnificent looking cup holder. Isn’t she a beaut? And it’s now totally portable! Bring it in the car to use as your seventh cup holder! Bring it to the movies because one cup holder there just won’t do! Put in on a leash and take it for a walk! You and your cup holder will be sure to have some wonderful times together.
And next, we are pleased to offer you what any person would want. DIRT! That’s right, it’s true. You too can own dirt! Just imagine what you can do with the power of dirt. Bury your pet parakeet! Eat it! Or put it on a leash and take it for a walk! Wait, what’s that? You’re not satisfied with this dirt? Well, how about, THIS DIRT? Yes, this dirt is totally different from that dirt. So if you’re looking for dirt, we’ve got two!
And what goes better with dirt than paint? And best of all, it’s blue! And isn’t that really the best color? It’s Cool! BLUE! From the same people that brought you yellow.
Here, we have a napkin. Yes, I know, I can’t believe it either. But we have a napkin! As the seller so correctly notes, it’s a “MUST HAVE ITEM FOR ANY BASEBALL FAN OR COLLECTOR”
And last, but not least, we have a RIPPED STICKER! Have we gone crazy for selling this? We just may have! Now, you can let your guests know to be alert of foul balls when entering your bathroom! Or even your bedroom! How zany! And this ripped sticker can be yours for just $249.95!!! YOWZERS! What a deal!
But don’t wait! Order your cup holder, dirt, paint, more dirt, napkin, and ripped sticker right now! What a country!