I cheap viagra canada refuse to buy beer at baseball games. I simply won’t pay $7 for a Bud Light. I don’t have it in me.

At the same time, I’m not about to sit through a game sober.

My solution? I sneak a couple of small bottles of Jack Daniels or Captain Morgan into the stadium and mix them with a Coke. Sometimes I put the contraband in my cargo shorts. Once I shoved a bottle in each of my shoes (which made walking kinda difficult).

The only problem with smuggling in booze is that I feel a little guilty violating MLB policy. Not a lot guilty — somehow I manage to sleep at night — but a little guilty.

But now I can rest easy knowing that MLB wants me to sneak liquor into games. Why else would they have started marketing this — an MLB flask!

I bet if I place my order now I’ll have it in plenty of time for spring training.

6 Responses to “Sneak booze into games with your official MLB flask”

  1. That sounds like a good idea, but aren’t you paying $5 for a Coke?

  2. Coley Ward says:

    A Coke is like $3.50, which is still a major rip off, but better than a $7 beer. You can bring in your own Coke, but keeping it cold is a challenge.

  3. I too have mastered the art of sneaking a flask into sporting events.

    Another great tip – if you sign up for the designated driver program at the game a lot of teams will give you a coupon for a free coke.

  4. Coley Ward says:

    What is this designated driver program? Do all teams have one? Do you have to sign a pledge not to drink? Inquiring minds want to know.

  5. hmm.. maybe it’s just a hockey/football thing. I don’t recall seeing it at a baseball game – but I thought that might just be because I mostly go to games at Wrigley.

    At some stadiums – if you promise to be the Designated Driver you sign up for some contest.. and you get a coupon for a free soda. then they pick one of the drivers to win some prize towards the end of the game. I have no idea what the prize is though… probably not booze..

  6. Lynniemac says:

    Citizens Bank Park has the free soda for designated drivers deal. Don’t know anyone who’s ever used it. Make of that what you will.

Leave a Reply

    Recent Comments

    • planet hobbywood: This is very interesting.
    • Bren: He is a awesome player and a good man.. sweet.. polite.. friendly.. down to earth.. he never acted as though he...
    • HADAJUN( Japanese): Okajima a Japanese hero?
    • Rickt: I am the biggest Cal Jr fan around but one of my good friends played minor league baseball in the Orioles...
    • HADAJUN: I wish for play in Japan. The death is regrettable.


    Subscribe via email

    Enter your email address:


Featured posts

December 5, 2011

Will anybody get elected to the Hall of Fame this year?

Last week, we asked you to vote for who you would like to see enshrined in baseball’s Hall of Fame. The verdict? If it were up to UmpBump readers, nobody would make it in. The leading vote getter (so far) is Jeff Bagwell, who has 60% support. Of course, in the real voting, players need […]

January 5, 2011

Annual UmpBump Hall of Fame Balloting: 2011 Edition

In what has become an annual tradition, we here at UmpBump cast our ballots for the Hall of Fame on the eve of the announcements of the voting for the real Hall of Fame. Voters can vote for anyone ever who has been retired from baseball for at least five years and is not already […]

October 19, 2010

Crowdsourcing the Greats: The Top 10 Managers of All Time

Now that we’ve looked at every position on the diamond, as well as relief pitchers, we are nearing the end of our “Crowdsourcing the Greats” series. But before we finish, let’s turn one more time to the internet hoi polloi for answers on who the greatest baseball manager of all time was. As usual, we […]