Yesterday at UmpBump HQ we were talking about baseball (quelle surprise)…and about official team flasks…and before we knew it, we were making up our own drinking game. I hope you guys like it as much as we do. And if you read UmpBump at work? Well…don’t let that stop you from giving it a spin. (It is Friday.)
Every time Sarah mentions Jason Varitek’s game-calling skills, take a drink.
Every time Alejandro lambasts “MLB new media goons,” take a drink.
Every time Nick rips Ned Colletti, take one very small drink. (We don’t want you to end up in the hospital.)
Every time Coley finds an excuse to post the Pat Burrell shirtless photo, take a drink.
Every time Sarah finds an excuse to post any photos of Gabe Kapler, take a drink.
Every time Furman Bisher despairs over how statistics and minorities are ruining baseball, take a drink (but make sure it’s not an import). If you think “Furman Bisher” sounds like a fake Yahoo! chatroom name, drink the rest of the beer.
Every time Murray Chass rips bloggers, blogging, the Internet, Al Gore, Bill Gates, or ENIAC, take a drink of water. Now you can keep playing without having to worry about the hangover.
Every time the BBWAA admits a woman, drink a whole beer.
Every time the BBWAA admits someone who has ever used BABIP, shotgun the beer.
Every time a commenter on Deadspin claims a gorgeous woman is a butterface, smash a beer can to your forehead to demonstrate how cool you are.
Every time Dan Shaughnessy pisses off Curt Schilling, throw your beer in someone’s face. If “CHB” means anything to you, take the empty can and crush it against their forehead.
Readers, we at UmpBump want to keep drinking. Please leave us more rules in the comments!