I admit it. There was a time when I thought that the Snuggie was kinda funny. I mean, you can stay warm AND answer a telephone at the same time. It does have its merits.

But look, we have to let this go. We should have done so at least a year ago, if not earlier. I don’t want to see anymore Snuggie pub crawls, I do not want to see anyone wearing the Snuggie “Wild Side”, and I swear to Willie Mays, if I see a dog wearing this, I am going to lose it.

However, society just won’t let me move on. Now I have to hear about this goddamned thing in the baseball realm:

More than 40,000 fans at Angel Stadium wore complimentary Hideki Matsui “blankies” during the fifth inning of the Angels’ game against the Twins on Tuesday to break the Guinness World Record set by the Cavaliers, the NBA franchise that had 17,758 fans wearing fleece blankets on March 5.

I know I am a miserable bastard who refuses to do 99% of group activities (this includes, but is definitely not limited to, congo lines, charades, quiz nights, the cha-cha, networking – both business and social, interactive murder mystery games, the wave, and keeping up with the Kardashians. Yes, that counts as a group activity since I highly recommend a spotter to even attempt it), so maybe it’s just me. But what is the purpose of handing out Snuggies in April in Southern California? And if the LA Metro area is so freaking hip, why are they imitating something done in Cleveland of all places?

The Snuggie is no longer funny. Seeing them nowadays is like listening to a song backed-up by T-Pain (which, I believe includes 63% of hip-hop/dance songs produced since 2007). It’s become so ubiquitous and constant that the humor of it all is simply gone, having pretty much become a part of normal life. And I don’t want it there.

So to the Marketing department of the Anaheim Angels (yea, you heard me, ANAHEIM), think of something new. Like getting Alfonso Ribeiro to host a “Mad Tight 90s Night“.

One Response to “Angels Break Snuggie Record: In Related News, Angels Are Lame”

  1. I want so badly to say that I agree with you, but your hatred of interactive murder mystery games is unforgivable. Honestly though I do agree. The humor is gone. Lets move on. (That rhymed)

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