Today is the bleakest sports day of the year.  The MLB All-Star game is complete and, unless you’re a fan of the ESPYs or <<gulp>> the WNBA, there are no notable sporting events until tomorrow night’s 7:10pm first pitch.  What’s a baseball fan to do?  We here at Umpbump have some ideas:

  1. Take a break from statistically analyzing player performance to do three weeks worth of work, at work, so you don’t have to do anything meaningful for at least the remainder of the month.
  2. Please your wife/girlfriend/significant other.  Sexually, romantically, chore-related, whatever.  Now is the time to earn points that will last you through September, when you’re watching baseball at a frenetic pace and can’t afford the time to walk the dog.  Or change a diaper.  Or perform in bed.
  3. Start P90X.  By the end of the regular season, you’ll only have 89 more days to go.
  4. Engineer a solution for BP.
  5. Finally watch that DVD of “All About Steve” that you got from Netflix four months ago.  It got rave reviews.
  6. Forget that you hated George Steinbrenner when he was alive. Hail him as a visionary.
  7. Mail a silicone replica of Nolan Ryan’s fist to Robin Ventura as a birthday present (yes, it really is his birthday).
  8. Start a compost pile.  Because it’s good for the environment and you probably didn’t get around to #4.
  9. Try to figure out what FourSquare is or does or means.  It’s no longer explicitly tied to the game that you played with your geeky friends in elementary school.
  10. Think of a #10 for our list.  Alejandro’s “De-flea your cats” idea didn’t cut it.

One Response to “What to do on the summer’s only off day”

  1. Alejandro says:

    Well it’s gotta be done! Why not de-flea them tonight?

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