Hump Day readin’

Why read our long-ass HOA posts when you can read the “half-assed” haiku version on Babes Love Baseball? It’s like the Cliffs Notes of season previewing, only way awesomer.

ArmchairGM points out to Hank Steinbrenner that Red Sox Nation (which Hank called “a bunch of [expletive]“) has infiltrated New Jersey. I guess that makes up for all the Yankee fans in Connecticut, though I still consider those people traitors. And I’m sorry Hank, but Red Sox Nation is not a creation of ESPN. It wasn’t even a creation of the Red Sox, though marketing genius Larry Lucchino certainly capitalized on it. It was a creation of Dan Shaughnessy. Or maybe even Nathan Cobb.

And via Awful Announcing….wiffle ball fight! (Fight over wiffle? That’s just piffle!)

Speaking of the Sox-Yanks rivalry and of fighting, check out this story on Baseball Think Factory about a bunch of Sox fans in Cambridge jumping a Yankee fan at Central Square’s Cantab Lounge. The Cantab, which is well-known in the area for its Bluegrass Tuesdays, describes itself as a “meeting place for multi-ethnic, multi-generation” people. Apparently this diversity does not extend to sports teams.

Moving on down the Red Sox police blotter, Sox and Dawgs has a good guess what Boston scout Jesse Levis was doing when he committed that “lewd act.”

Baseball Reflections would like to know if Sean Casey is for real. So would I.

Jeff Pearlman at ESPN ripped Nomar a new one for not being happier on Autograph Day. And lest you think Garciaparra was just having an off-day, he showed the same surly demeanor when I saw him signing at Spring Training five years ago. In fact, since Nomar left Boston, I have heard so many stories about his sourpuss ‘tude that I have been forced to admit that my long-standing love for Nomie was unappreciated and undeserved. Oh well. It’s not the first time Sarah’s affections have been bestowed on an unworthy object. I’ve loved worse men than you, Nomar! So don’t go thinking you’re special!

The Sports Hernia looks at Dmitri Young and Nick Johnson and wonders what (or who) they ate for lunch.

At SI, Tom Verducci wonders if a pure DH could make the Hall of Fame. Specifically, David Ortiz. Plus, what Big Papi eats for breakfast (hint: it’s not mango salsa).

Corey Patterson finally got a job…a minor league deal with the Reds, finalized late on Monday…and according to Bus League Baseball, he may actually start the season over Jay Bruce, SI’s No. 1 prospect, which would be a shocking turn of events if it actually came to pass. But Bruce has a mild quadriceps strain, which may give Dusty Baker just the excuse he needs to go with crappy and old instead of young and talented.

And finally, from Can’t Stop the Bleeding, we bring you Joe Beimel’s number one fan.