Now that the fans have voted Shane Victorino on to the all-star team, manager Charlie Manuel has just one more roster decision to make. He’s got to decide who will replace injured Carlos Beltran, and he’s got to make his decision by this afternoon.

The addition of Victorino means the NL team already has its starting CF. But unless Manuel wants to play “The Flyin’ Hawaiin” all nine innings he might want to add one more athletic outfielder.

The other NL all-star outfielders range from so-so fielders to defensive disasters. Justin Upton is young and athletic but has never played in center field. Ditto Hunter Pence. Ryan Braun is a converted 3B who is still learning LF. Brad Hawpe sucks. And Raul Ibanez should be a designated hitter.

The front-runner for the last roster spot is Matt Kemp, who is an above average defensive centerfielder with good speed and a quick bat. Kemp’s counting stats are impressive (46 RBI, 46 runs, 19 stolen bases and 10 HR) and he’d have more RBIs and runs if not for Joe Torre’s bizarre decision to bat Kemp eighth in the Dodgers’ lineup on most nights.

One week ago Kemp and his 131 OPS+ might have seemed like a no-brainer choice for the last spot. But lo, we have a late entry to the contest. Jayson Werth has hit five homers in his last seven games, and now boasts 20 HR on the season, to go with his 54 RBI, 59 runs scored, 12 stolen bases and 132 OPS+. Werth is ordinarily a right fielder, and the last thing the NL team needs is another corner outfielder, but he can also play a capable center field. He’s played in CF five times this season and over 20 times in 2008, when Victorino was hurt.

Frankly, both Kemp and Werth deserve it. They both probably deserve it more than Victorino, and they both definitely deserve it more than Ryan Howard.

It should be noted that Giants 3B Pablo Sandoval is also deserving of an all-star spot, but the NL team already has two capable 3Bs (David Wright and Ryan Zimmerman). Sandoval can also play 1B, but the NL team already has FOUR 1Bs, so I think Sandoval might get the shaft. Or, at least he should get the shaft if Manuel is actually going to try and win this game. Then again, if he was really intent on winning he wouldn’t have picked Howard. So I guess all bets are off.

UPDATE: Werth got the final spot. I imagine a lot of fans of teams not named the Phillies are cursing Charlie Manuel and his overt favoratism. But don’t get mad at Manuel for picking Werth, who was a deserving choice. Get mad at him for picking Howard.

At 5pm today, voting closes for each league’s 25th All-Star over at MLB.com. As of this writing, Evan Longoria leads the AL voting, which is fine by me although Giambi’s another worthy choice. But I do have a problem with Corey Hart being the top vote-getter for the National League. The man’s a fine player, to be sure, and I’m glad to see he’s getting some recognition. But he simply hasn’t been as good as 3 of the other eligible candidates, David Wright, Carlos Lee, and Pat Burrell (Why is Aaron Rowand eligible? Can someone please explain this to me?).

However, in my mind, there is one clear choice. And as a Mets fan, I obviously have to vote for… Pat Burrell.

Whoa. Did I just write that? Hold on. Let me try this again. <ahem> I think we should all head over to MLB.com right now before 5pm and vote for… Pat Burrell.

Dagnabit! There it is again. Why can’t I just write David Wright? D-A-V-I-D W-R-I-G-H-T. He’s clearly a deserving All-Star. And I can’t vote for Pat Burrell!!! He’s a Phillie! I think I’ve been possessed. Excuse me while I undergo an exorcism:

FATHER DAMIEN KARRAS: Remember Paul. You’re a Met fan. And a fan stands by his team.

PRINCE OF DARKNESS: But Burrell’s been better.

FATHER KARRAS: Lies! Such Lies! Wright has a better batting average!

PRINCE OF DARKNESS: By three measly points. Totally inconsequential.

FATHER KARRAS: Look at the RBIs, Paul! The RBIs! Wright has 16 more!

THE P.O.D.: Only because Wright has had 213 plate appearances with runners on base. Burrell has only had 145 and has performed much better in those situations than Wright.

FATHER KARRAS: NOW YOU JUST WAIT A… Huh? Really?

THE DUDE WITH THE HORNS: Yup.

FATHER KARRAS: But what about defense! Ah-Ha! David plays third base – a far more demanding and important position than left field and does so admirably!

THE MAN WHO OWNS RYAN SEACREST’S SOUL: That may be true. But Burrell’s .414 OBP and .587 slugging percentage is more helpful to his team than Wright is with his .381/.504. Glove or no glove.

FATHER KARRAS: But Philly’s a hitter’s park while Shea is a pitcher’s paradise!

DAVE GROHL: Still doesn’t account for that much a disparity. OPS-Plus, which is park-adjusted, has Burrell miles ahead of Wright, 157 to 136. It’s no contest. And Burrell also has Wright beat in Win Shares.

FATHER KARRAS: Why do you speak in such evil tongues? Paul, remember you are a Met fan! A MET FAN! HE’S A PHILLIE!!!

PRINCE OF DARKNESS: Sorry Padre. But the man’s mind is made up. It’s Burrell.

FATHER KARRAS: NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

………..

So, yeah. Go vote for Pat the Bat. He deserves it.

When the All-Star ballots were announced earlier this week, the emails started flying here at UmpBump HQ. We felt compelled to offer up our own ballots (admittedly, with the benefit of casting them now, and not months ago when the balloting actually began), which we now present, interspersed with refreshing dashes of acid-tongued banter, for your scathing refutation insightful commentary:

Sarah’s All-Star Ballot

American League

C Joe Mauer

1B Youk (note: I actually voted for Youk last year too. Couldn’t vote for Papi as a 1B; didn’t seem right.)

2B Kinsler

3B A-Poop

SS Derek, grudgingly

DH Ortiz (yes, even injured)

OF Manny (sentimental choice)

OF Grady Sizemore

OF JD Drew (Was very tempted to go with Josh Hamilton here….but I flipped a coin and Drew won. Plus, Hamilton’s heart-warming story has just become too much for me. Now every time I hear about it, I want to vomit.)

SP Roy Halladay

National League

C Geovany Soto (at first, felt obligated to go with Brian McCann, since I don’t really like voting rookies into the All-Star game, but then I remembered that I don’t like the Braves….and Soto and McCann have basically had the same year so far.)

1B Lance Berkman

2B Chase Utley

3B Chipper Jones

SS Hanley Ramirez

OF Ryan Braun

OF Griffey Jr

OF Matt Holliday

SP Brandon Webb

Final note: Why is there no NL DH? I mean, they’re playing in Yankee Stadium…they aren’t going to make the pitcher bat, are they? If there were an extra roster spot for a hitter, I would go with Pat the Bat here.

Nick: Griffey??? For serious?

Sarah: I’m big on future Hall of Famers going to the ASG. And he hit no. 600 this year. And, once again Nick, i must ask that instead of simply sending incredulous snarkages back in my direction, you actually put together your own ballot. That was actually the point of the exercise.

Nick: Okay, here are my picks. Clearly they are all 100% correct.

Nick’s All-Star Ballot

American League

C Joe Mauer

1B Jason Giambi

2B Ian Kinsler

3B Alex Rodriguez

SS Michael Young

OF Jermaine Dye

OF Grady Sizemore

OF Josh Hamilton

DH Milton Bradley

SP Cliff Lee

National League

C Geovany Soto

1B Lance Berkman

2B Chase Utley

3B Chipper Jones

SS Hanley Ramirez

OF Pat Burrell

OF Jason Bay

OF Adam Dunn

SP Edinson Volquez

Nick: Sarah, are you saying future Hall of Famers should go to the All-Star Game every year, no matter what? Even when they only have the 46th best OPS among qualified outfielders?

Sarah: I’m just saying, doesn’t feel like the All-Star Game without Griffey. Also, I feel the voting would be very different if it were all online. When you’re just sitting in your little seat at the ballpark poking those little punch cards, are you really going to be comparing OPS and clicking through ESPN.com’s sortable stats? No, no you are not. You are going to see “K. Griffey Jr.” there on the ballot with a little perforated circle next to it. And you are going to poke that little circle.

Paul: My ballot:

Paul’s All-Star Ballot

American League

C: Joe Mauer (and if any of you disagree, I’m leaving UmpBump)

1B: Justin Morneau (can’t argue with Youk or Giambi either. i just don’t like either of them.)

2B: Ian Kinsler

SS: Empty Space

3B: A-Rod (although it’d be a lot of fun to see Longoria there)

LF: Josh Hamilton

CF: Grady Sizemore

RF: JD Drew

DH: Milton Bradley

SP: Roy Halladay (not the popular choice, I know. but dude’s been filthy)

National League

C: Geovany Soto

1B: Lance Berkman

2B: Chase Utley

SS: Hanley Ramirez

3B: Chipper Jones (i just died a little inside)

LF: Jason Bay

CF: Nate McLouth

RF: Matt Holliday (wow, what an awful defensive outfield!)

DH: Pat Burrell (now i need a drink)

SP: Volquez/Lincecum (don’t make me choose)

Sarah: No you have to choose! That’s the whole point! Come on, eenie meenie minie moe that puppy.

Paul: in that case, excuse me while i go crunch some digits….and i think i unknowingly made that sound a little dirty. How did i do that? That should be the new euphemism among statheads. “Dude, that girl is so freaking hot. Makes me want to crunch my digits.”

Sarah: Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrd!

Paul: Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanddddddddddddddyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!! (anyone? anyone? yes? no?)

Sarah: [confused silence] [chirping of crickets] [tumbleweed rolls slowly by]

Paul: It’s from Family Guy. And I’m going with Lincecum.

Sarah: And are you still leaving AL SS blank?? I’m torn. Half of me thinks that’s really hilarious. The other half is now bitter because i sucked it up and voted for Jeter.

Paul: I would honestly rather have Empty Space. He’s a ragamuffin from the great state of North Dakota. Kid’s got more talent than brains.

Sarah: He’s got that blue collar makeup though.

Alejandro: Okay, time for my picks.

Alejandro’s All-Star Ballot

American League

C Joe Mauer

1B Kevin Youkilis

2B Ian Kinsler

SS Michael Young

3B Evan Longoria

OF David DeJesus

OF Josh Hamilton

OF Johnny Damon

DH Alex Rodriguez

SP Cliff Lee

National League

C Geovany Soto

1B Connor Jackson

2B Chase Utley

SS Jose Reyes

3B Chipper Jones

OF Carlos Lee

OF Aaron Rowand

OF Carlos Beltran

SP Edinson Volquez

Nick: What, no Hanley at SS, Alejandro? Even though he’s carrying your umpbump fantasy team? Surprising!

Alejandro: Oh man i knew i’d miss someone….Yeah, forget Reyes, please include H Ramirez instead…

Sarah: Hey, I’m not sure it’s kosher to have A-Rod as the DH. You can only vote for people where they are eligible, no? Or can you shift things around with the write-in?

Alejandro: Good point… I dunno…to be honest, i filled this ballot in haste in the middle of a meeting…

Paul: Get your priorities straight, Alejandro. All-Star ballots are serious business. Not to be done in the middle of business. This business clearly supersedes that business.

Coley: I think the problem with including guys like Griffey is that this year it counts! And, I’m kinda serious. I mean, if the Phillies are denied home-field advantage in the World Series because Ken Griffey, Jr. strikes out with the bases loaded in the all-star game, I’m going to be pissed. Here’s my lineup:

Coley’s All-Star Ballot

American League

C Joe Mauer

1B Jason Giambi

2B Ian Kinsler

3B Alex Rodriguez

SS Michael Young

OF Jermaine Dye

OF Grady Sizemore

OF Josh Hamilton

DH Milton Bradley

SP Cliff Lee

Barry Bonds is an all-star. He got voted into the NL’s starting lineup, beating out Alfonso Soriano in the sketchiest election since Bush beat Gore.

Frankly, I don’t understand it. I don’t understand how millions of Americans could vote for a guy who is the poster child for all that is wrong with baseball. And I’m not the only one scratching his head. SI’s John Donovan sums up the bizarreness of the situation today:

What’s strange, though, is that a lot of different polls — ESPN/ABC, CBS News, USA Today, the Associated Press, CNN and many others — have indicated that most fans don’t believe Bonds when he claims he’s never used performance-enhancers. A good chunk of fans, the polls say, don’t want him to break Hank Aaron’s career home run record. (He’s now only five away from tying it.) When he finally pushes past Aaron’s mark, many fans told the pollsters that they won’t consider it a genuine record. Many polls show that fans, simply put, just don’t like the guy.

So either those polls are way off, or the ballot boxes were stuffed, or fans changed their minds, or they simply don’t care about any of that stuff anymore, or they don’t think any of that should apply to an All-Star Game, or they don’t think any of it should apply to this particular All-Star Game, or … something.

Amen, John. Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. And Barry Bonds fans are from a whole ‘nother galaxy. It’s enough to make you think the whole thing was fixed. And, frankly, I do.

Except, I can’t figure out why MLB would rig this election. It won’t solve anything. Bonds will be the biggest story at the all-star game — wether he plays or not. He’ll either be on the verge of breaking Aaron’s record, or he’ll have recently broken it. He’ll be playing in his hometown. Or not playing. Regardless, he’ll dominate the news.

So taking the decision to put Bonds in the game or keep him on the sidelines out of Tony LaRussa’s hands won’t solve any of baseball’s problems. But it makes me feel better to think that MLB rigged this election. Because I’d rather believe that Bud Selig is corrupt and clueless — not a giant stretch — than think that America actually wants to honor Barry Bonds.

UPDATE: I’m not the only one who thinks this voting was fixed. The FANHOUSE thinks so, too. 

All-Star Game fan voting is coming to a close. Tomorrow is the last day ballots will be counted. And the question on everyone’s minds is, should Barry Bonds be an all-star?

Pretty much everybody thinks so. Except, you know, a majority of the fans.

Take a look at what the media and some former players are saying:

Cal Ripken, Jr.: Yes, there’s a shadow that’s hanging over top of him. The commissioner and Hank Aaron are torn whether they should celebrate the breaking of the all-time home run record. But when I think of Barry, I think of him as an all-star player.

• Tony Gwynn: There has to be one guy from each team, and there’s no question, I think, he’s having the best year on that team.
• John Ames, Arizona Daily Star: The All-Star Game is a popularity contest, and Bonds is the game’s biggest draw. People love Bonds. Most love to boo him…. The All-Star Game this year will be played in Bonds’ home park. His biggest fans should not be denied a chance to see him there.
• Gene Wojciechowski: MLB rules say that each team has to have at least one All-Star representative. The Giants, who will finish dead last in the NL West, need somebody, so that somebody ought to be Mr. Martyr instead of the other two San Francisco candidates: catcher Bengie Molina and pitcher Matt Morris.

I understand where these pro-Bonds guys are coming from. It makes sense that as long as Bonds is allowed to play in regular season games, he should be allowed to play in the All-Star game. And it makes sense that as long as Bonds is the best player on the Giants, he should represent the team at the All-Star game.

But I can’t help it. Every time MLB heaps one more honor on Barry, I get a little sick to my stomach. The guy should have been banned long ago. Now, not only do we have to endure his pursuit of Hank Aaron’s home run record, but we have to give him a place at the All-Star game?