Many have been predicting the San Francisco Giants to suck, and suck hard, this season. Some have even predicted a 100-loss campaign. So how are the Giants doing so far? Let’s have a look…

As is to be expected, the Giants are last in the Major Leagues with 27 runs scored in 11 games, or an average of 2.45 runs per game.

Sole good hitter Aaron Rowand is struggling at the plate and in the field, due to the fact that he probably has a broken rib.

Centerfielder Dave Roberts will likely have surgery on his knee and be out for months.

In other injury news, top outfield prospect Nate Schierholtz is out with a wounded right shin, outfielder Randy Winn hurt his ankle by hitting himself with his own bat, and reliever Keiichi Yabu has blurred vision after hitting himself in the eye with a rubber band.

Switch-hitting outfielder Dan Ortmeier has been so sucky hitting from the left side that he and the team have made a mutual decision to make him an exclusively right-handed batter from now on.

Putative team ace Barry Zito (0-2) has already been so terrible that he was booed by the home crowd during his introduction at the Giants’ home opener in San Francisco.

Even The Onion is piling on the Giants now, with their article “San Francisco Giants Band Together To Score Run.”

UPDATED 2/8/08 9:24 am–below

Curt Schilling has a shoulder injury. And according to reports, it’s more serious than the injury that caused him to miss 7 weeks last season.

Curt Schilling has visited Dr. Craig Morgan, who performed surgery on his shoulder in 1995. Sources have told reporters in Boston that Morgan feels Schilling needs surgery, while the Red Sox would like him to rehab his shoulder without surgery. The sources also say that the Red Sox have inquired about voiding his contract, which calls for a base pay of $8 million with several more million in incentives. Obviously, Schilling does not want his contract voided.

At this point, the injury is believed to be a rotator cuff or labrum tear. Surgery would end Schilling’s year, almost certainly. And he’s said this is definitely his last year.

Neither Schilling nor the Red Sox have publicly commented on the injury or the dispute as of yet, which is an ominous sign. If Schill had just visited Dr. Morgan to say “Aah,” he would have no doubt quickly released a statement to quash these rumors.

Schilling had a physical before he and the Sox inked this deal. Did they miss something? Or did he hurt his shoulder pulling the lever for McCain on Tuesday?

UPDATE: Schilling has “screaming pain” in his arm and”can’t throw a baseball, and has pain simply shaking hands or opening a door.”

From the Boston Globe:

Schilling will attempt to give the shoulder-strengthening program another try. If he doesn’t respond as well as he did last season, he has the option to walk away from his contract and have surgery to prepare for ‘09 with another team…there are no shock waves on Yawkey Way. Both sides knew there wasn’t much left in his right shoulder before all this came out.

Here, in its entirety, is the statement released by the Red Sox:

Curt Schilling was examined by Red Sox doctors in January after he reported feeling right shoulder discomfort. Curt has started a program of rest, rehabilitation and shoulder strengthening in an attempt to return to pitching.

Seems that Schilling’s desire to have surgery has gone by the wayside. Neither side has addressed the supposed contract-voiding debate, but Curt has since posted a response of his own on his blog:

There have been disagreements these past few weeks in an effort to provide me with a solution that would allow me to pitch as much as possible during the 2008 season. At no time did I ever consider taking a course of action against the clubs wishes. In the end, regardless of who agreed with whom, I have chosen the clubs course of action and will vigorously pursue any and every option I can to be able to help this team to another World Series title in 2008.

Please understand that a lot of what has been reported is not true. When the club feels it’s appropriate to further discuss the details of this issue publicly I will elaborate…

After being diagnosed by the Red Sox medical staff I sought a second opinion, as anyone would, and when it became clear there was disagreement (which is not uncommon by the way), I agreed to see an independent Doctor from a list the Red Sox provided me, for the third opinion.

They were saying on the radio this morning that Curt’s injury is not a labrum or a rotator cuff, as previously speculated, but a problem with his biceps, according to the Boston Herald:

It is Morgan’s diagnosis that Schilling’s main problem stems from the bicipital groove, the portion of the bicep tendon which runs outside of the shoulder…and is an irreversible problem, if just using the Red Sox’ recommended remedy of a cortisone shot and rehabilitation.

“In my opinion a conservative approach will be unsuccessful, and that a surgical option is medically the correct thing to do and has the only potential shot of him being able to salvage his coming season,” said Morgan, who estimates Schilling could be ready to pitch by the All-Star break with the procedure…

[The third doctor] agreed with Morgan’s diagnosis that the pitcher’s biceps tendon had become diseased, but also concluded Schilling’s rotator cuff was a significant problem, and he wouldn’t be ready to pitch during in 2008 if Morgan’s proposed surgery was performed.

Morgan says the biceps (or the tendons?) in question “look like spaghetti.” I suppose that’s the medical term.

Just a few days after we wondered in this space what if anything was wrong with David Ortiz to cause him to hit for higher average but less power this season, the answer comes straight from Ortiz himself: he has been secretly playing through a knee injury since last June!

According to Ortiz he first injuried himself during a batting practice at Yankee Stadium last June when he caught his foot while fielding a bunt in some webbing put down by the Yankees  to protect the area around home plate.  Ortiz had ‘a couple” of MRIs over the remainder of the season, which revealed a torn meniscus in his right knee, but doctors said it was not major and Ortiz was little discomfort, so he played through it.

As soon as Ortiz stopped playing baseball in the offseason, the pain went away entirely, and he also felt nothing in spring training, so he saw no need to get treatment.  However, yesterday Ortiz revealed that the knee has been bothering him ever since the season started “much more than it normally used to.” He says the knee prevents him from getting into as deep a crouch in the batters box as he normally does, forcing him to “stand up more” at the plate, and ”When I stand up more, my body go forward more than I normally do, and it changes things.”

All of which goes a long way toward explaining Ortiz’s uncharacteristic numbers at the plate this year.

If last night’s Yankees victory over the Red Sox teaches us anything, it’s that the Yankees are a scary team when they’re able to field a healthy major league starting pitcher.Unfortunately for the Bombers, they haven’t been able to do that very often this season.

Last night, Chien Ming Wang went 6 1/3 innings, giving up seven hits and two runs, while walking three and striking out five. That’s not even spectacular. It’s just good. It’s adequate. But it’s a hell of a lot better than most of the Yankees pitchers have fared this season.

Thanks to injuries, the Yankees have become the first team in baseball history to employ seven rookie starters through their first 42 games.

In addition to pitching injuries, New York has had to play without Hideki Matsui and Johnny Damon for weeks at a time.

The Yankees had so many injuries to pitchers through the first month of the season that they fired their trainer, who only had the job a few months.

And that’s no recipe for success. You know makes for a very tasty recipe? Boston knows.

The Red Sox, who now hold a 9.5 game lead over the Yankees, recently put Josh Beckett on the DL, making Beckett the first Red Sox pitcher to miss a start this season. And his injury — a cut finger — shouldn’t even count. That’s not an injury. It’s a hindrance. It’s a bother.

There is little doubt that the Yankees’ hopes for mounting a comeback hinge entirely on their pitching staff’s ability to return to form and stay healthy. Mussina must regain the consistently he had last year. Clemens must be worth the multi-multi-multimillion dollar investment. Philip Hughes must prove he’s ready for the bigs.

That’s a lot of “ifs”.

Of course, if the Red Sox are going to stay on top, Beckett’s finger needs to heal, Schilling’s knees have got to continue to (improbably) support his gut, Wake’s knuckleball has to keep knuckling (it didn’t look so hot last night).

Oh, and it wouldn’t hurt if J.D. Drew stayed healthy, although that might be asking a bit much.

This was quick, even for Chipper. From the AP:

Atlanta Braves third baseman Chipper Jones sprained his left ankle on his first at-bat Monday and was removed from the game St. Louis.

Jones broke awkwardly from the box on a grounder to first and jogged a few steps before turning around and limping to the dugout. The team said Jones, who has been plagued by foot problems in recent seasons, was day to day.

Jones is batting .222 (4-for-18) this spring with one double and two RBIs.

A lot players, as they get older, make the move to the AL so that they can continue to pile up stats and pad their Hall of Fame candidacies as a DH (see: Mike Piazza). But Chipper needs more than just a DH role. He is gonna have to start playing the game over the internet from the safety of a padded room. And even then, he’d probably still develop carpal tunnel syndrom.

Of course, there is one possibility here that probably needs mentioning. Sarah Green is taking in some Cactus League action in Tucson this week and yesterday reported that she and intrepid gal-pal Suz Tolwinski won Hooters coupons at the Diamondbacks game. Now, I don’t know if the Braves offer similar Hooters giveaways, but if they do it’s a good bet that Chipper got his hands on a few of those coupons and is just faking the ankle sprain so that he can spend his afternoons lunching at his favorite restaurant.

Yes, that’s right: Ken Griffey Jr. is injured yet again.

He can’t even stay healthy in the offseason! This time, it’s a broken bone in his left hand, that he suffered in what reports are only calling a “home accident” because Griffey will not allow anyone to say exactly how the injury occured.

You know what that means!  Either the way he got injuried was terribly embarrassing, or else he got injured doing while something he shouldn’t have been doing.

Reports are now saying that Griffey broke his hand “playing with his children” but that could easily be part of a cover story. What do you think? Was Griffey injured while carrying deer meat for his children, or does “playing with his children” really mean he was popping wheelies on his motorcycle (for his children)?

If you were Jason Giambi and you were getting ready to have surgery on your wrist, there are probably a few places where you wouldn’t want the surgery performed: a barnyard, the top of a mountain, the building where a teammate’s two-seater plane crashed just a week earlier, etc.

But it seems like Giambi’s surgery may in fact take place in one of those places. Can you guess which one?

Giambi’s procedure is being done by Dr. Andrew J. Weiland, who is an attending orthopedist at New York Hospital for Special Surgery. Weiland’s office is in the same high-rise that Corey Lidle’s plane crashed into last week.
From the New York Post:

The office of Weiland, who is actually the Mets hand specialist, is in the Belaire, the same Upper East Side high-rise the late Cory Lidle’s plane crashed into last week. Not only were Lidle and Giambi Yankees teammates, they played together with the A’s and were South Hills High School teammates in California. Giambi attended Lidle’s memorial service in Orange County Tuesday. There is a chance the surgery will take place in Weiland’s Belaire office.

This definitely falls into the “what are the odds?” department. Thanks to Zvee for pointing this story out.

This is a story that would get you fired from the Writer’s Guild. It’s too “over the top.”

I mean, of course you want to show the team in it’s darkest hour, getting swept in a 5-game series agains their arch-rivals. And then you want to increase the drama a bit by having the team face some injuries.

But really, every player getting injuried, all at once? And not only just your normal injuries, like knees, wrists, and obliques, but then you think, hey, why not heart trouble? And now, you are giving the team’s star rookie starter cancer? I mean, really, cancer? Back pain was just too dull?

The Red Sox injury list is insane: Trot Nixon (biceps), Jason Varitek (knee), Wily Mo Pena (sore wrist), Alex Gonzalez (oblique muscle), Manny Ramirez (knee), David Ortiz (heart trouble), and now Jon Lester (cancer).

It’s like George Steinbrenner just outbid the Mets for a Cuban Voodoo priestess who was picked up in a raft last week. You could only get away with a plot like this on the Simpsons.

What’s next? Mike Lowell gets gigantism? Mark Loretta is convinced by a hypnotist that he’s a chicken? Jonathan Papelbon gets radiation poisoning moonlighting at the local nuclear power plant?

Cause they’re almost all that’s left.

But if this really were Hollywood, there’s only one way this story would ever end. The most improbable ending of all! And it would start with wacky things like Alex Cora homering off Alex Rios’s hand.

I can already see Kyle Snyder taking his perfect game to the mound in the bottom of the 9th in game 7, after Corky Miller just singled in the potential game-winning run…

Oh no. This can’t be good.

Then again, everytime the Phillies subtract a player, they seem to get better.

The Philadelphia press is reporting that Adam Rowand, who collided with 2B Chase Utley during last night’s game against the Cubs, will miss five weeks with a broken ankle. From the Philadelphia Daily News:

Phillies centerfielder Aaron Rowand suffered a broken left ankle Monday night when he collided with second baseman Chase Utley chasing a pop fly off the bat of Cubs first baseman John Mabry, sources indicated early this morning.

Rowand had been talken to the hospital after the Phillies’ 6-5 win over the Cubs for what were termed precautionary X-rays.

He’s expected to miss at least 5 weeks, which would likely make him unavailable for the remainder of the regular season.

Rowand is out. Gordon is on the DL. Abreu has been traded. If the Phillies win the wild card, it will be the single most improbable playoff appearance since…I dunno…ever? Can this team keep winning? We’re talking about a staff led by the Brett “Fists of Fury” Myers, Tommy John patient Randy Wolf and phenom and bar fighter Cole Hamels. Oh, wait, I forgot, they just traded for Jaime “I’m not old I’m wise” Moyer. They have a 3B, Abraham Nunez, who is struggling to stay above .200 and a catcher who, at 33, is in his FIRST major league season.

Okay, just kidding. (Please, no anthrax letters to UmpBump HQ.)

Seriously, though, the injuries to my beloved Red Sox just keep adding up. Jason Varitek, Trot Nixon, Matt Clement, Tim Wakefield, Keith Foulke. And those are just the major guys currently out. Let’s not forget David Wells and Coco Crisp missing major time earlier this year. And Mike Timlin hasn’t been the same since coming off the DL in June. Now Mike Lowell is limping.

As if all that weren’t quite enough, Doug Mirabelli injured himself in the course of tonight’s game as well. New veteran (”new veteran”?) Javy Lopez replaced him mid-game. After Varitek’s meniscus tear, Mirabelli’s twisted ankle, Josh Bard’s raging case of fingerus butterificus, and Tim Wakefield terrifying John Flaherty into retirement, Javy might want to take out an insurance policy or buy some juju beads or something.

Then Curt Schilling really tried to send all of Red Sox Nation into cardiac arrest by trying to barehand a well-hit ball with his pitching hand.

Curt, we appreciate the effort, but let’s not have a sequel of the “bloody sock.” Sequels are never as good as the original.