Nick forwarded the above story to me yesterday. I read the headline and was shocked—SHOCKED. Joe Torre was trying to sabotage Andruw Jones! Then I read the article. Apparently, Torre was not, in fact, trying to derail his centerfielder. He was trying to get him “on track,” not “untracked.” After some anal bitching between Nick and myself, Nick turned up several more examples—it appeared that this word was being misused all over the world of sports journalism! (So why am I writing about it and not Nick? Nick said it was too anal, even for him. I have no such compunctions.) Behold:

“With Bedard back, McLaren can concentrate on getting the offense untracked.” (Seattle Post-Intelligencer)

“Ortiz, Sox can’t get untracked.” (Worcester Telegram)

“It won’t matter what the pitcher’s name is when Ortiz gets untracked.” (Hartford Courant)

“The hitters seemed to get untracked a bit in the past week, so perhaps it’s now Sabathia’s turn to get it all together against the Royals.” (MLB.com)

Is the American rail industry in such dire straits (note: not dire ’straights’) that we’ve lost our ability to use the simple railroad metaphor, “get back on track”? As with many misused turns of phrase (note: not ‘terms’ of phrase), there’s some confusion about what “untracked” actually means. These sportswriters, if they’re thinking at all, seem to be mishearing “on track,” thinking it’s “untracked,” and confusing being on a track with being “stuck in a rut.” Thus, to get “untracked,” to them, is a good thing. (For similar mistakes, see: “Play it by year;” “For all intensive purposes;” “A mute point;” “A tough road to hoe;” “Sewing his wild oaks;” and “Tow the line.” You play something by “ear.” You don’t have “intensive” purposes, but intents AND purposes. It’s a moot point, not a mute one. If you’re hoeing a road, no wonder it’s so tough—trying hoeing that “row” instead. Likewise, it’s a lot harder to sew wild oaks than sow wild oats. And if you’re towing the line, what’s the line and where are you taking it? You might be better off “toeing” it.) But as the Language Log notes, the only entry in the OED for “untracked” is “not furnished with a track or path” and “not tracked or traced.” But I don’t think these writers mean that once Big Papi eludes his trackers, he’ll start hitting again.

The worst part is, the editors of these publications are either unaware of the problem or, where the term appears in a headline, even perpetuating it. (Kudos to Bob Costas’ producer, who seems to have shouted a correction into his earpiece after he slipped up in this clip.)

You know, lives aren’t at stake here. This is sports journalism. Maybe to some folks, that excuses such sloppiness. But I say, if it’s not well-written, what’s the point? Sports writing is like the dessert of the journalistic meal. It’s just empty calories, so if it doesn’t taste good, why eat it?

During yesterday’s broadcast of the Indian’s home-opener, the two announcers went back and forth as to how much work the ground’s crew had in their hands a few days ago due to a snow storm that had blanketed the city (and the Prog’s field), and what great work it had done to get the field ready for the game (a situation very similar to last year’s opening day).

Being April fool’s day, and in what continues to be a trend of lazy journalists having to readjust their careers*, the Cleveland Plain Dealer decided to have some fun with the inclement weather, posting a flash-based video game on their website.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but this is the first second iteration known to UmpBump (see comments) of a video game designed and created by for a newspaper, and it sure signals what could become a new source of revenue as the newspaper industry struggles down its path into oblivion.

The graphics are pretty rudimentary, the skill needed to play is on par with your ability to click through pictures of lolcats, and the fun factor isn’t that much more than having to wait out a rain delay watching America’s Funniest Videos reruns from the mid 90s, but you have to give the Plain Dealer some points for scoring the front page of reddit.com (albeit, for the crappyness of the game – the headline is “Quite possibly, the worst flash game ever”).

So there you have it folks, the role of your local newspaper isn’t that to inform but to entertain. Whodda thunk it.

*This, of course, isn’t corroborated, but it’d be pretty funny and ironic if the flash designer for the game were a converted journo.

Edit: So it’s not the first, see comments.

Among certain of my friends, the phenomenon of “Sarah’s Angry Emails” is not unknown. Something sets me off (usually involving politics, sports, ex-boyfriends, feminism, a particular downstairs neighbor, or some combination thereof) and before I can stop myself, I’ve seized my keyboard and pounded out a single-spaced screed. This happened recently in regard to a post I wrote that got picked up by Deadspin (always interesting, the folks that wander over here from Deadspin). Only instead of Sarah’s Angry Email, it was Sarah’s Angry Blog Comment, and instead of going only to an ex-boyfriend/my e-mail drafts folder/the spam filter of one of these columnists, it ended up on the Interwebs for all to see.

Though the ranting began because of a particularly limp Bob Ryan column, the weakness rampant throughout sports journalism had actually been a topic of discussion between Nick and myself for some time. (And of course, it’s been a frequent topic on UmpBump is well, thanks to the likes of Murray Chass, Jay Mariotti and other MSM folks and their questionable writings or uninspiring broadcasts.) So after a recent spate of emailing between us, Nick and I decided what the heck, let’s post this private conversation and open it up for public comment.

Read the rest of this entry »

In an exercise of good karma (and a show of how frustrating it must be to cover a $100 million, 57-game-winner in September) the Chicago Tribune will give a White Sox fan the chance to live-blog (or as they call it, “from the cubicle play-by-play”) an upcoming game.

White Sox fans, we know you’re out there. If any of you have the day off on Sept. 6 and 12 or are just out of work, we’d love to have you participate in ChicagoSports.com’s first ever User Generated Cubicle.

We need you to man our world-renowned From the Cubicle play-by-play feature as the Sox play AL Central foes, the Tigers and Indians.

Two things right off the bat. Why does the MSM continue to act as if they invented the internet and everything in it? It’s not called “play-by-play”, grandpa. It’s now called live-blogging, and everyone is doing it. Welcome to the party.

Second, this has to be the most crass, tasteless move the MSM has ever tried. Noticing how fetid the White Sox performance has been so far, the Trib’s journos decided to throw in the towel and let the kids handle it (not entirely true, but makes for good punditry - ask Mariotti). Sure, they’ll tell you this is well-intended, for the kids, so they get their journalistic feet wet.

I’m not buying it.

What’s more, the Trib has tried something like this before, soliciting a column dubbed “View from a Sox fan” a few years ago, only to kill it and leave zero trace of it on their servers. (Full disclosure: I was one of those “fans” once, alas, you can’t find my trace anywhere, not even in the archives).

Honestly, though, I can’t blame the Trib. It’s been torture to watch the White Sox this year, especially if you have to turn in a 700 word recap later that night. So good luck to those who try it out.

Oh, one of the requirements is geographical, you have to live in Chicago (you get to file your “play-by-play” from the “Tribune Tower”). Otherwise I would’ve signed up (so sue me).

- Wanted: Sox fans that can type. [Chicagosports.com]