First of all, dear UmpBump readers, an apology is in order. We had a very heated exchange today with our hosting provider due to their decision to pull down the site.

As a result, we had to strip most of our sidebar links and other things (ie, like having two posts on the home page). Like my mom says, you gotta look at the positives, so we’ll be redesigning the site to increase efficiency and avoid database resource “over-use” (btw, any WordPress theme designers out there that want to contribute, let us know).

And now, as an apology for the downtime I present to you all this special video I came across today, featuring the beautiful HBW alumna Juliana Ramirez and a new HBW inductee, Leslie Holliday, wife of All-Star Slugger Matt Holliday, appearing in a beauty-at-the-ballpark special on the Today Show.

Très, très belles.

Yogi Berra lip balm, though? Talk about odd…

Nick: Wow, shoving front office types to the ground appears to be becoming quite popular!

Paul: wasn’t george costanza the yankees’ traveling secretary? or was he the assistant to the traveling secretary?

Coley: I’m pretty sure he was the assistant to the traveling secretary. Though this latest Manny being Manny incident does seem like it was ripped from a Seinfeld episode.

Sarah: Manny certainly has a much hotter temper this year.

Paul: is it wrong for me to say that i hope he and shields go alien vs. predator on each other tonight?

Coley: if hoping that Manny and Shields come to blows is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.

Sarah: It’s times like this when I really do miss having Pedro and Trot Nixon on the team.

Paul: well, the mets currently have both. and i kind of wish we didn’t.

Sarah: Oh, yeah. That’s weird. Well, they make a great duo. Pedro will throw at some guy’s head, the guy will charge the mound, and Nixon will sprint all the way in from right field, get there before anyone else does (seriously, he DOES have wheels, but only in fights), and flatten the enraged batter with one punch. Ahhhh, those were the days.

The passion frequently displayed by Kevin Youkilis in the batter’s box has been a subject of amusement to fans. As hilarious spoof site Call of the Green Monster will amply demonstrate:

Several Injured During Youkilis Strikeout-Related Temper Tantrum

For Kevin Youkilis, every single at bat is an epic life-and-death struggle, with the fate of the universe seemingly hanging in the balance.  It is a Shakespearian drama, in which the meaning of life, the vagaries of fate, and the inevitability of tragedy loom deeply…

This weekend, that inevitable tragedy struck for the Red Sox as Youkilis was called out on strikes and proceeded to shatter his helmet and break his bat into pieces, sending razor-sharp shards of material flying into the dugout.  Several players were treated for lacerations and bruises…

But apparently, Youk’s teammates don’t find his trademark intensity quite so entertaining. And now, an unnamed Red Sox insider has revealed that it was Youk’s bad attitude after a frustrating at-bat that led to Thursday night’s tussle with Manny Ramirez in the dugout:

“It all happened because Manny complained about Youkilis’ habit of throwing bats, helmets and other objects in the dugout when he has a bad at-bat, something that has become a constant practice,” the source said.

“Other players have told Youkilis in the past about the situation, which makes him look selfish and that he is more worried about each at-bat than about the team. If Boston is winning easily, there’s no reason to throw objects all over the dugout because of a bad at-bat.

“There was a meeting where the team let Youkilis know that many of his teammates were tired of his explosive reactions for each bad plate appearance. It became very bothersome … more so when the team is winning and it’s in first place. There’s not much room for individualistic attitudes.”

Youk, dude, chillax.