Recently at UmpBump HQ, there’s been a lot of Boston Red Sox talk. While the Yankees have acquired themselves some big-ticket items and the already-strong Rays made a few smart, affordable moves, the BoSox have been raiding the sale rack. And they’re clearly not done yet — this morning’s announcement was the signing of Takashi Saito, and there’s word they’re also focusing on Miguel Montero. We debated a few of their recent moves, for Josh Bard, Rocco Baldelli, John Smoltz, and Mr. Jamie Kotsay.

Coley: Now the Red Sox have signed Mark Kotsay. How is this guy a fourth (or even fifth!) outfielder? The Sox have insane depth. It really is like they have money to burn.

Paul: the 4th/5th OF thing isn’t so important as promising these guys PAs. Baldelli is always a game-time decision. Plus, Kotsay spells Youk at first, who will also spell Lowell at 3rd. He’ll get a decent amount of playing time. Plus, it seems that Kotsay is a very good defensive firstbaseman and isn’t terrible offensively. I think it’s a good use of 1.5MM.

Coley: That’s what I mean about Boston’s depth. They’ve got Kotsay who can play outfield and 1B. They’ve got Youk who can play 1B and 3B. They’ve got Lugo who can play SS and 2B and Jed Lowrie, who can play almost any infield position. Regarding at bats, I understand why guys want to play for Boston, but I’m surprised a guy like Kotsay wouldn’t go somewhere where he could get more at bats.

Sarah: “They’ve got Lugo who can play SS and 2B” should read: “They’ve got Lugo who sucks no matter where you put him.” (Readers: take one drink.) Kotsay wanted to go somewhere where he could be a regular, I thought he just couldn’t find a taker.

Coley: I understand that Kotsay couldn’t find a starting job, but there surely are teams where he stood a better chance of getting regular playing time, or “burn” as we call it in the industry. The Giants, for example, need an outfielder and a 1B, and Kotsay plays both. Maybe Kotsay’s counting on Lowell being hurt and Youk playing third?

Sarah: Why not? Lowell was hurt for much of last season. And I think if the choice is limited playing time with either the Giants or the Sox, the answer is pretty clear.

Coley: I don’t think it’s clear. Both the Giants and Sox have a shot at making the playoffs this season. Both play in gorgeous stadiums. And the weather and food is better in San Francisco. Plus, I’m sure Kotsay has roots in the Bay area from his days in Oakland.

Paul: Maybe the Manny situation played a role. If Kotsay thought there was a chance that Manny signs in SF, there goes his “burn”.

Sarah: Those are all good points. But maybe he’s just as happy not to move across the country right now, all things being equal. Or maybe he just really likes red Sox fans. :)

Coley: He doesn’t need the warm embrace of Red Sox nation. He’s got Jamie. And I don’t think there’s much chance Manny signs in SF. They don’t have the money.

Paul: I don’t think that Manny’s going to end up in SF either. But it’s all about creating doubt. Say, the Red Sox played that hand – “Manny might go to San Fran. Stay here and you don’t have to worry about it. But you have to decide now.”

Coley: That’s probably roughly what they told Brad Penny, right before they went out and signed John Smoltz.

Paul: I don’t think the Smoltz situation will hurt Penny. (Beckett-Lester-Smoltz (after he recovers) -Matsuzaka-Penny.) It’ll hurt Wake. Now the whole “bringing Josh Bard back” thing makes sense. I was wondering why the Sox would do that when they shipped Bard out a couple of years ago because he couldn’t catch the knuckler.

Sarah: Another big draw for players (maybe in Penny and Baldelli’s case) is Boston’s medical staff. They are known for having basically the best medical staff in MLB. Plus, being in Boston, they have access to some of the best doctors and hospitals in the world. I think the Sox signed Bard because they realized:

a) he was one of the better options (if not the best option) for a backup catcher
b) they have openly said trading him away was a mistake
c) they are not done trying to get a young catcher to replace Tek as the starting guy

Coley: I’m really interested to see if a Buchholz-Saltalamacchia trade happens. The Bard thing confuses me a little, though. If the Sox do land Salty, I don’t see them starting the season with Salty and Bard as the two catchers. First of all, I don’t think either of them can catch Wake. Second, if the Sox land Salty, I think they’ll pair him with a veteran.

Sarah: They did carry three catchers for pretty much the whole second half last year. Besides, anyone who turns out to be surplus can be traded this summer.

Paul: I don’t understand the three catcher thing for an AL team. You’re already down one bench spot for the DH. Why burn another one with the third catcher? Then again, the Red Sox are far smarter than i am.

Coley: If the Sox did carry a third catcher, and it was a veteran, it would have to be somebody who was just happy to be on the roster. I don’t think Tek would sign on just to mentor the kids. Maybe Sal Fasano is available?

Sarah: At this point, if the Sox do get, say, Teagarden for Buchholz, this is how I see it playing out:

• Tek and Tea split time; Tea catches Wake (if Wake even pitches — he was injured for much of ‘08 too)
• When Tek gets injured, Tea takes over; Bard backs him up (Tek plays hurt all the time — probably hurts more than JD Drew ever does, but is made of pig iron, chewing tobacco, and Clint Eastwood’s spit, so he never says anything  — but with a young, talented catcher on the roster, he wouldn’t have to keep sucking it up all the time).
• If it’s Salty and not Tea, the Sox have Salty take over first base now and then; Wakefield retires rather than force Bard, Salty, or Tek to catch him, because Wake always puts the team first. He’s just that kind of guy.

Nick: If the Sox trade for a catcher, they definitely won’t resign Varitek. If the trade happens, one of Bard or the new guy will have to catch Wakefield.

Sarah: Well, yes. That is the unspoken “nuclear option.” Though part of the reason no other team wants to sign him is that they’ll have to give up a draft pick to do so (because the Sox offered him arb and he declined) and so far, no one has wanted to do that. So even if the Sox do get a young catcher in addition to Bard, Varitek still might end up in the Sal Fasano posish of “just wanting to be on the roster.”

What do you guys think? Sox fans, how do you feel about this bevy of small moves compared to New York’s two giant signings? Non-Sox fans, would you want to see your team take a chance on Varitek? What about the Saito move? And we barely touched on Smoltz! Let’s keep the convo going in the comments.

Less than one year ago, Mark Kotsay’s wife Jamie was still a mystery, a legendarily hot baseball wife whose pictures were so rare that her hotness remained largely unknown and unworshipped. But UmpBump.com changed all that last spring when we used our insane ninja skills to bring you the largest collection of Jamie Kotsay pictures ever assembled in one place.

But now we are upping the ante.

That’s right, thanks to a source who wishes to remain anonymous, we now present to you a collection of scans from Jamie Kotsay’s modeling days which have never before been seen anywhere on the internets. Ever. Until now!

Is Jamie Kotsay really the hottest baseball wife of them all? Decide for yourself:

(Pictures continue after the jump)

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Bigfoot. The Loch Ness Monster. The Yeti. A Devil Rays fan.

Yes, the world is full of myths and legends about shadowy, elusive, one-of-a-kind creatures who may or may not even exist.

But now you can cross Jamie Kotsay off that list, for we here at umpbump can attest to the fact that she does exist and pretty much everything that has been said about her is true.

It has been well documented that many famous athletes, and baseball players in particular, often have scorching hot wives. But what has been harder to prove was the contention that Mark Kotsay just may have the hottest wife of them all…

You see, it all started back in the late 1990s when Mark Kotsay first made it to The Show. At each city Mark played in, fans of that team would begin to report sightings of his incredibly, unbelievably, scorching hot wife. They said her name was “Jamie.” They claimed that this one time, at the fan convention, they caught a brief glimpse of her between a gap in the crowd, but when they got closer she had vanished. Or that this other time, at this one game, in the 6th inning, she flashed briefly on the jumbotron screen to make a public service announcement or something.

And pretty much everyone agreed she was the hottest baseball wife they had ever seen.

But the problem was, try as everyone might, nobody could find a picture of her! The claims could not be corroborated! Soon message boards with thousands of threads grew up around her legend. Search engines were bombarded with her name. Cults grew up around the fervent belief that she really did exist, and that she really was the hottest wife in the game. And still no picture could be found!

But then finally, last summer, this shot appeared on an Athletics blog!

For a long time, this picture was the only picture of Jamie Kotsay making the rounds on the blogs, but it certainly went a long way toward substantiating the myth! With the letters K–SA- clearly visible, it was almost certainly her, and the picture certainly lent itself to an interpretation of potential hotness of great magnitude. But while this view definitely had its merits, all true Jamie Kotsay sleuths knew in their heart of hearts that in the end a view from the front would be required to truly assess Jamie’s ranking in the pantheon of hot wives.

That’s were we come in. Finally, this spring, we here at umpbump decided enough was enough and agreed to take up this difficult case, if only for the good of science.

Although we certainly did not have either the time nor the inclination to read through the voluminous discussion boards dedicated to Jamie Kotsay’s legend, we did happen to have secret knowledge of some ancient ninja web-searching techniques, so we put it to good use compiling what we believe is the largest single collection of verified Jamie Kotsay pictures on the internet.

Judge for yourself if the legends are true after the jump…

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