The Detroit Tigers have a stacked lineup, but their pitching has been a glaring weakness. Their bullpen, which many pointed to as a flaw before the start of the season, could certainly be better, but it’s not the problem right now.

“Everyone talks about the bullpen being a soft spot but I don’t think it’s fair to say that yet,” said manager Jim Leyland. “It’s not like they have been blowing leads. Heck, we haven’t had leads to blow.”

Leyland was actually talking about his team’s lackluster hitting, but he might as well have been talking about their starting pitching, which has been a black hole of suckery so far this season. Four of their starters have ERAs of over 6.00. And two of those have ERAs of over 7.00. Everyone, even staff ace Justin Verlander, has been downright awful. But what kind of awful? Let’s take a look.

1) No durability. Heading into tonight’s games, the other AL pitching staffs had between 16 and 12 quality starts. Detroit’s staff had 4. (Two of those have come from Armando Galarraga, who could be sent back to the minors at any moment.) Detroit’s only major winter addition to the pitching staff, Dontrelle Willis, is currently on the DL with a hyperextended knee. Another key piece of their starting rotation, Kenny Rogers, is 43 years old, and has been unable to go five innings in three of his five starts.

2) No control. The league average for walks? 92. Detroit’s total? 119, good for second in the AL, right behind the god-awful Texas Rangers. Detroit is also second-worst when it comes to WHIP, K/BB, and hit batsmen.

3) A lot of earned runs allowed. In terms of team ERA, Detroit’s 5.03 is second to last in the league, saved again from being last by the craptastic Rangers.

4) No domination. The Tigers are 10th the league in K/9. They ain’t fooling nobody.

5) No efficiency. Detroit pitchers have the second most pitches per plate appearance of any AL staff.

And lest you think it’s just bad luck, their pitching staff’s BABIP is .280, pretty darn close to the average.

Expect them to be eager buyers in July.

In retrospect, this should’ve been a liveblog. Oh well.

From: Paul
To: UmpBump Staff
2:21 pm (Eastern Daylight Time)
So I’m following the game on MLB Gamecast here at work today. I just wanted to report that all of Jamie Moyer’s fastballs are showing up as “changeup” on the pitch type. Yes, he’s that slow.

From: Coley
2:25 pm
I just blogged that there’s talk that there could be a fight at the game today. But then I realized, there is 50 percent less of a chance than usual, because you can’t get mad when Jamie Moyer hits you with a pitch.

From: Sarah
2:38 pm
I just ducked out of work to listen to the first inning of the Sox-Tigers game in my car radio. With Kenny Rogers on the mound, I couldn’t figure out why the announcers weren’t talking about the game. “What’s happening?? Why aren’t they calling the pitches?!?!” I needn’t have fretted. Turns out, Rogers is just working thaaaaaat…..slooooow.

Read the rest of this entry »

Oooof. That’s the sound coming out of Detroit this morning. A few days ago, you might’ve heard “D’OH!” or “GAAAH!” or any number of expletives. But this morning, there is only the resignation and deflation of a drawn-out “ooooof” as the last remaining molecules of enthusiasm leak out of Michigan like air from a punctured tire.

Any day your ace pitcher takes the mound, you want to win. But when that ace pitcher is doubling as the only pitcher on your staff not surrounded by flashing neon question marks and you’ve lost the first five games of the season, you really, really want to win. And when instead of winning, you drop to 0 and 6…oooooof.

If you’re a Tigers fan, you see Justin Verlander taking the mound, you figure their lineup is due to get some hits, and you reckon their time has come. You don’t expect to get routed to the tune of 13-2. Add the info that the team doing the routing, the Chicago White Sox, are a division rival, and it’s just rubbing salt in the wound. And like a bad traffic accident, we can’t look away. Let’s do some rubbernecking and see what some Tigers blogs have to say about this pile-up.

Eric Jackson of D-Town Baseball attended the game, but found it so embarrassing, he left early. “I don’t leave games early too often but I did tonight,” he writes. “It was cold and there just wasn’t a good game out on the field. Listening to the game on the ride home made me feel good about my decision.”

Bless You Boys offers a slightly different take on the sound of woe emanating from the Motor City (EEEEAAAAAK!) as Ian Casselberry asks his readers, “You don’t really want to read a recap of that game, do you? Because I sure as hell don’t feel like writing it.”

At Mack Avenue Tigers, a shell-shocked Kurt Mensching adds more lamentation (”MEHHHHHHH”) and writes: “The ‘greatest lineup in baseball’ averages 2.5 runs per game. The Tigers hit into five double plays. They stranded nine runners.” Yes, Virginia.

Over at Roar of the Tigers, Samara Pearlstein is deep in the denial stage. “What… was… that? Seriously: what did I just see on my TV? Was it baseball? I’m not entirely sure. It LOOKED like baseball, but I’m inclined to believe that it was simply a very detailed fake.”

“Time for chicken-bone cross,” confirms Mike McClary of the Daily Fungo.

And for the ultimate exercise in masochism, you can read a liveblog of the game at The Detroit Tigers Weblog. An abridged version:

8:15 - middle of 1: A 19 pitch inning. Not exactly the kind of efficiency you’re looking for. And Verlander can’t seem to keep his fastball down.

8:40 - I didn’t know it was possible to go 3-0 on Juan Uribe.

9:40 - Aaaarrrrghhhhhh.

So we’ve got “EEEEAAAAAK,” “MEHHHHHHH,” and now “Aaaarrrrghhhhhh.”

10:35 - Top of 9: Do you realize if it weren’t for White Sox errors and wild pitches this would be a shut out?

10:55 game mercifully over: Fitting that it ended on a double play. This blew.

What’s wrong with this team? Lee Panas of Tiger Tales has a sobering diagnosis:

Poor pitching (by their Ace Justin Verlander no less), poor hitting including five double plays, horrible fielding especially by Carlos Guillen….they are just awful in every phase of the game right now. I’m still very confident that this team is going to score a lot of runs this year but other than that I’m not sure what to expect. The pitching is filled with question marks and their infield defense looks much worse this year with the immobile Miguel Cabrera at third and Guillen struggling at first. Even Edgar Renteria, while an improvement over Guillen, is showing his lack of range at shortstop.

So let’s see—pitching, hitting, fielding….yep. That pretty much covers it.

Many blogs note this faintly quivering ray of hope: Curtis Granderson’s hand is sufficiently healed. He’ll resume baseball activities today and rejoin the lineup in about 10 days. Granderson’s return will add speed to a team that one scout called Jurassically slow without him.

But as for the popular idea that a road trip will clear their heads (and heat up their bats), I think Roar of the Tigers put it best:

Hilarious note for the upcoming series: the Tigers were just swept (a billion times, it seems) at home, and the Red Sox were just swept by the Blue Jays on the road (after having been on the road for a billion years, it seems). Everyone is talking about how much good it’ll do the Sox to get home. Everyone (or, OK, mostly Joe Morgan tonight) is talking about how it’ll do the Tigers some good to get on the road. Rock, meet Hard Place.

But Detroit Tigers fans weren’t the only ones to get hit hard in the kisser last night. Home plate umpire Jeff Kellogg took a fastball to the face (Fire Joe Morgan notes that AJ Pierzysnki “got crossed up and just missed it”). Kellogg was wearing a mic for the game, giving Jon Miller got the bright idea of airing the audio from the incident. The moment seems to encapsulate, in allegorical fashion, both Detroit’s 0-6 start (symbolized by Kellogg) and the baseball-watching world’s stunned reaction (embodied by Pierzynski):

(smack)

Pierzynski: Oh — my God.
Kellogg: (on the ground) Fuck.

Free coffee and baseball: This is a match made in heaven, from Sarah’s point of view. Two notes: 1. Jose Canseco is worried that he’ll get poisoned via free coffee. 2. Jonathan Papelbon is advertising free coffee (with purchase of either a flatbread sandwich or a pizza) at Dunkin’ Donuts, available the day after the Red Sox win. Sounds a bit complicated to me—and it’s cheap of DD to exclude their own employees. Not to mention that Paps looks like a cheeseball in this photo. Why didn’t they just go with a real post-game shot?

Speed: the Blue Jays are going to be swiping more bags this season. And speaking of speed, I enjoyed watching the A’s relievers throw over to first with Jason Varitek standing on the bag. Yes, let’s make sure the 35-year old catcher doesn’t steal.

Fans: It just goes to show you that the Dodgers really do have a special relationship with their fans, as LA hurler Brad Penny warmed up with a lucky fan yesterday. Across town, Angels owner Arte Moreno bought souvenirs for several fans. And it seems that Baltimore’s long-suffering faithful are finally abandoning their ballclub. Just don’t get mad when the Sox come to town in May and bring their hordes of free-spending fans with them, transforming Camden Yards into Fenway South. The O’s need the revenue.

No-hitters: Yesterday, ESPN.com carried a teaser for the Chicago-Detroit game saying the Dontrelle Willis was throwing a no-no through five innings. To me, that’s just false advertising. Sure, it’s technically accurate to say that D-Train ended up one-hitting the White Sox, but it would perhaps be more descriptive to say that Willis went five innings, while walking seven and striking out none. It was the least dominant no-no bid I’ve ever watched. An outing more worthy of ESPN’s hype would have been Jake Peavy’s two-hit complete game or Manny Parra’s legit seven-strikeout no-hit bid, carried through five innings.

Reds Rookies: On the heels of Johnny Cueto’s stunning debut Thursday, another Reds rookie pitcher impresses today. Edinson Volquez has pitched five innings so far, with seven K’s and one earned run. He’s scattered three hits and two walks.

Sleep: The Red Sox really do need it. Their odyssey from Florida to Japan to California to Toronto is starting to tell, and it’s most readily apparent on defense. Boston has already committed two errors halfway through today’s game. They had two errors yesterday, too, and have racked up a number of sloppy near-errors over the past few games. They have a day off tomorrow and open Fenway Park on Tuesday.

Via Deadspin and The Fanhouse, Dodgers Broadcaster Steve Lyons would like his homeowner’s insurance to pay for a little accident…that time a couple years back when he grabbed that woman’s wrist and demanded she show him her boobs, and then got sued. It was an Act of God, I’m tellin’ ya! But seriously, what would Vin Scully say? (Interesting aside: his official bio includes the line, “He has earned national notoriety as a staple of Fox Sports’ coverage of Major League Baseball from 1996-2006, where he earned an Emmy Award and two additional Emmy nominations during his tenure with the network.” I’m not sure “notoriety” was quite the word they wanted right there, but it certainly seems appropriate now.)

Over at Salon, King Kaufman has an interesting meditation on the no-hitter—why it’s superior to other athletic achievements and why he tries to jinx them at every opportunity.

DBacksBuzz notes that Randy Johnson did not fare well in his start for the AAA Tucson Sidewinders last night. ExtraBases notes that Bartolo Colon was strong in yesterday’s AAA Pawtucket Red Sox opener.

BlessYouBoys on Detroit’s April stupor.

DodgerThoughts defends bloggers against—guess who?—Murray Chass. The blog’s author, Jon Weisman, followed the New York Times columnist on Charlie Steiner’s XM talk show yesterday. Chass, alas, used his airtime to rail against bloggers. Weisman gave a thoughtful, measured response, thus demonstrating that bloggers = more thoughtful, measured than Murray Chass. In his post, Weisman also notes that despite the knock that bloggers live in their parents’ basements, the only time when he’s actually moved back in with his parents was during his two-year stint as a beat reporter. (Hat tip to BrewCrewBall, where I read it first.)

And finally, Beyond the Box Score had a bunch of good tidbits yesterday (Bill James on Fenway’s left field, the first of many Joe Torre managing miscues, and what PETA would like to call the new Nationals ballpark (hint: it’s not Furmeat Field).